RIP Lissa
Ok, one of my former bosses died at the beginning of May. That sucked so bad. Well now, I got an email from my friend Hannah that one of our former co-workers died too. *yikes* Maybe it's a good thing I'm not still working there.
Geez, this sucks. Lissa was only like 40 or so. She had 3 kids. Single mom. Her youngest daughter is probably about 9 by now. I used to baby-sit for her on occasion. She loved those kids like there was no tomorrow. (oh, , there isn't going to be a tomorrow ... that sentence just brought tears to my eyes)
She was the most sarcastic woman I have ever met. She was sometimes fun and sometimes funny. We'd laugh our asses off and make fun of our boss. But most of the time, Lissa was on my ass.
At work she could be a total cunt. She told Hanna that she didn't know why, but she just didn't like me. I don't mind people picking on me, but she would purposely hit you where it hurt. I know that she tried to get me fired on several occasions, but I think she liked having someone to boss around more.
She clock-watched me and criticized everything I did. Lissa was the most anal retentive OCD person I have ever met. "We need to go fix the fax machine cartridge." I finally started asking her ... "Ok, is that we WE or we ME?" Well, you know the answer.
I also never understood her very well. Lissa was from the Valley. Bordertown. She was a pretty Hispanic woman, but married a White guy. She'd never ever date anyone who wasn't White. She knew Spanish, but refused to speak it or teach it to her children. *note to Lissa, they have to take a language in high school in Texas... so sooner or later....*
Lissa was always very interested in my business. She was constantly asking me personal questions about my social and personal life. I was pretty young and stupid, so I'd tell her stuff. Big mistake. She'd then turn that around to pick on me. If I told her I went out on a date, she'd always ask what color the guy was.
She and her daughter actually came to my wedding. I couldn't believe it, because the groom was brown.
My only business trip for that company was to a useless training class in Manhattan. Lissa came with. We spent a week there. Lissa and I shared a room, and after a few days her husband joined us.
I love New York. My grandfather and father were born in NYC, and I was born in Westpoint. It's in my blood. I enjoyed my trip very much, but I tried to stay away from them. They were the tourists from hell. Me, well I felt like I was finally HOME.
Everywhere we went, they hit the gift shops first. We took the Staten Island Ferry and went to see the Statue of Liberty, Ellis Island, etc. I wanted to spend some time there looking around, but they just wanted to see the gift shops. BUY, BUY, BUY. I told my family that I was going to spend my money on doing things and seeing stuff. They'd get some matchbooks or brochures. None of them minded and wanted me to have a good time.
We went to the Empire State Building (it was beyond cold!), and went to Windows on the World. Unfortunately her dorky husband was wearing sneakers or something stupid and they wouldn't let us in.
In four days, we basically hit every touristy spot.
Finally, I had had enough of Lissa/Nanuck of the North (she bundled up like it was Alaska and constantly complained about the temperature - only in the 40s) and Cliff Clavin (her husband went on and on and on with useless information.) I spent an entire day at the Museum (MOMA). It was pure bliss. Silence, not rushing, not gift shopping.
I went to Town Hall that night and saw Ladysmith Black Mombazu. It was lovely. They went to see some Broadway monstrosity and critiqued it to death over breakfast the next morning. Cliff.... just shut UP... I prayed for patience (and silence).
Regardless, I had a great trip. Lissa took some really cool pictures of me. Deb with the twin towers in the background, Deb on the ferry, Deb in snow in New Jersey, Deb on Wall Street (spot the tourist in front of the Empire State Building -- Texan chick with the red lipstick. Big smile. Frowning native NYers... shit colored lipstick... big scowl)
[aside]I would like to return to NYC someday and go with someone I really like. And see if I could drink some of these improvers under the table... *heh* unlikely, now that I'm a lightweight. But I'd like to actually meet some of them.
One weekend Lissa paid me to come over and help her clean her garage. Now this is the woman that would color coordinate her file folders - grant folders orange, vendors green. She also made me use an alphabet system A = Left tabbed folder; B = middle; C = right, etc. So I was unbelievably surprised when I saw what a horrific mess her garage and house were. Clutter everywhere. Papers, toys, dishes... every surface in her house was covered with something. I felt like a shit, but somehow her mess comforted me. I felt only a tiny bit superior. (although now that I'm a working mom, I can only feel solidarity).
The other thing I remember is that her kids were: 1) always perfectly groomed. Beautiful clothes/hair. A picture of her daughter with this huge huge HUGE matching bow on her hair. Practically half her head. They were even in a commercial for a local grocery store.
and 2) they were involved in every activity. Swimming, baseball, t-ball, boy scouts, church activities. Three kids and all three were busy. She had this calendar to keep track of it. It is one of the reasons why I don't want Zoë too involved. (Sometimes kids just need to play).
Towards the end of my stint at that company, Lissa's husband kept getting really really sick. He was always throwing up and losing a bunch of weight. They did every test they could on that dude, but couldn't figure it out.
Years later Hanna told me he was bulimic/anorexic. Yikes! They ended up divorcing.
I never will figure out what made Lissa tick. The closest I can come is that her life was so hectic and out of order that she tried to control everything and everyone around her.
I'm sad for her kids.
I'm sad for her parents (they actually were really really sweet) and her two sisters.
Even though she was a bitch to me most times, I'm just really sad knowing that Lissa isn't on this earth anymore.
RIP my bitchy, funny friend.