You know when you have a nearly THREE hour doctors appointment, the news ain't gonna be good.
I just now got to work (fuck) at 1pm. My appointment was at 9am. I did some shopping in between to make myself not cry more.
It's not cancer or anything that serious, but my diabetes is all out of wack. I'm not dying (yet), but I just need to pay more attention to what I'm doing.
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Bad signs at your fucking doctors office.... turn around. do not pass go.
1. All of my personal information (name, address, etc) was all fucked up. I have a hyphenated last name and they had both names a) misspelled and b) switched. My address was really wrong and they were missing numbers. They were all rude when I had to correct them.
2. You have to go in fasting for your bloodwork. For a diabetic used to eating at regular intervals, this sucks hard. Not to mention that you wait 2 hours after your appt to get your labs done. Fuck you.
3. You get lectured by a stranger on how to be a more efficient super mom (get more money from ex - impossible; cook on sundays - when, before church/shopping/cleaning/laundry/playing with my kid??; bring your lunch to work - duh, already do; blah blah blah)
4. I'm a new patient to this guy. But his process was fucking long as hell.
Forms. Wait. Meet nurse. Weight. Height. Vitals. Sit in docs office. Wait. Play games on cell phone for 30 min. Talk to doc for 1/2 hour. Pee in cup. Strip to waist. Chest x-ray. Bloodwork. Meet other nurse. Strip to panties (great, I had to wear the sexy red ones - dumbass, I didn't think he'd be seeing them ) EKG.
Damn, first a chest x-ray then an EKG. All I could think was that my EKG would be bad and they'd wheel me into open heart surgery and Dr. E wouldn't be around to make sure I was ok. *waaaah, fucking waaaah*
Hot fucking room. Talk to doc. Bad labs. Very bad.
Get lectured big time by doc.
this is critical:
*hangs head in shame* breaks down crying in front of nurse and doctor, AND completely bitches him out for lecturing me and making me feel bad and sit there half naked. I think I stunned him.
Then I finally fucking eat. By this time it's 11:25. I'm used to eating breakfast at 5am. Fuck me.
Meet 3rd nurse. Finally a nice one. She showed me how to mix my new dosage of my new insulin (one shot a day vs. 2; new types).
30 minutes later pay and leave.
Fuck - great. Cried. I'm sure it was part insecurity of meeting a new doctor who I knew would be bitching me the fuck out (after having a superb doctor for 7 years - I loved that guy, but he went back to school), and partly because I was hungry as hell. Ate dinner at 8:30 last night, so nearly 15 hours later some PB crackers.
Basically my fasting blood sugar was really bad. tada - 260 after 12 hours of fasting. That fucking sucks. It's supposed to be between 70 - 120.
On top of that my average blood sugar levels for 3 months were really bad too.
Now I know this guy doesn't know me, but I have been a diabetic for over 8 years. I've seen 4 nutritionists, countless specialists, and have been doing my bloodwork every 6 weeks for 8 years (except for these last 6 months).
But fuck, I DON'T FUCKING WANT TO HEAR IT. I JUST NEED TO GET MY SHIT TOGETHER, SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME GO HOME.
The best prescription I could use would be a month long paid vacation. Couldn't we all!
someone cheer me up. The shopping wasn't enough, and my sweetie probably won't call until next week.
I still suck, but now I'm sickly and sucky.