Ok, I have sex. As often as I can.
But if you ever see me in public, I look like a fucking librarian. I'm invisible. No one looks at me. I have shoes that my friends call "instant birth control." I don't show boobs, I don't show legs (probably because I have the legs of a linebacker), and while I will wear tight pants, I usually wear them with a fucking tunic-like shirt. I might as well be wearing a bourka.
SOMEONE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THINGS HOLE-Y, PLEASE NOMINATE ME FOR 'WHAT NOT TO WEAR.' I SWEAR TO YOU!!
I'd love 5K worth of designer duds and a free trip to NYC. It would be worth getting humiliated to come out with something chic and sexy.
I have the most boring, hideous clothing known to man.
Why?
Because I never buy anything anymore. And when I do, tis' all kind of buttoned up.
Just for once I'd love to pretend to be my girl sugarsnit and dress all kinds of sassy. Sexy. And be comfortable doing it.
I wish I had some big honkin boobies to shove up to my chin. All my friends have boobs galore, and while I'm not like boyish by any means, and they are still pretty and a bit perky, they still aren't even big enough to shove together to make some cleavage. I don't even have the cleave.
I think I need to drink *before* I get dressed sometime. Then I can unleash my inner slut.
It would help if I didn't have things that covered every inch of flesh.
I am going to try to get bold. I'm going to go spend money I don't have. (I can't even talk about that matter now because it makes me shutter).
Posted by debutaunt at March 4, 2005 02:55 PMI assvise you to get some really low-cut duds. Girls with no cleavage can get away with cut-to-there stuff that us "endowed" girls cannot.
Posted by: Kristin at March 7, 2005 04:20 PM*ALL* your friends have boobs galore? Dude...did you break up with me and I didn't get the email??
Posted by: chantal at March 19, 2005 12:58 AM