debutaunt.com

Holiday Cheer

Today is Christmas Eve.

I am going to spend most of the day alone. But that's ok. I have Christmas cards to work on. Sis #1 is taking her family to the Texans game and then she is going to pick me up so we can eat steaks - yay!

My counts must be in the crapper. I have to sit up for a minute before I stand up as I'm a bit dizzy. I get really out of breath easily. And for some reason, I'm ungodly thirsty. My next lab work isn't until Tuesday, so I am thinking I need to really take it easy. I will. I have been.

Christmas day will be spent at Sis #1s house too. Then Sis #2 is going to bring my Zoe over. I can't wait to see her as it's been like two weeks and I've been missing her like crazy. I wrapped up Princess Fiona's laptop and that will be the present I give her. I wasn't able to get out and do any shopping this year, and I most certainly know I would never be able to afford anything that nice. I know she will love it and I'm so glad because now that she's learning to read, she will be able to play more of the games. I am going to tell her that it came from a Princess in a faraway land, so she will think that's cool. Fiona, you really made my Christmas so bright. You have no idea.

I found this picture, and it reminds me of what Christmas really should be like. Christmas at my parents with the big tree, packed full of presents, and a child who is so excited she can barely contain herself. And new Barbie Christmas pajamas.

I hear so many people complain about all the work that Christmas entails, but I have never been like that. Each year, since I have been a single mom, I haven't had a lot of money to buy Zoe any presents. But some how, I have had friends and family buy her so many gifts that it never seems that way.

Zoe and I used to decorate our apartment. We have this little fake tree - truly a Charlie Brown lookalike, with all these little ornaments we got at Target. Then we have a bunch of lights that we decorated every window and a wreath for our door. Then we had our stockings, and this beautiful Nativity set - Zoe always used to play with the Baby Jesus and rearrange the shepherd, Mary, and wise men.

Christmas has always been my favorite holiday. I never minded shopping and loved all the decorations everywhere. When I had my daughter, it just made it all that more special.

This year is special in that I feel like I have seen the Christmas spirit for months now. Complete strangers have given so much to the deb_fund that it totally shocks and humbles me. I don't think those people understand how much that means to me, and what a relief it has been to me and my family.

I truly feel so blessed that the worries are lessened, and that so many strangers care about me. Those benefactors will know for the rest of my life I will try to make them proud and I must do something of value with the rest of my life. I can never repay them, but I will do my damndest to show them that I can do this and will continue on their good deeds somehow.

This Christmas will be a good one. Even though it is different, that doesn't necessarily mean that it won't be great. It's just different - like I am different now. I think it's even better because it's like Christmas for me every day.

I can do this. With Christmas sprinkles on top.

Today your assignment is to take it easy. To not see the hustle and rush of Christmas, but to see it from Zoe's eyes. Excitement. The gift of true giving and the Christmas spirit. Fun. Family. Appreciating what you do have and not what you don't. Today is a day to slow down and really think about how the holiday should feel and then make it so. You'd be suprised how little all the rest of it means when you look for the spirit. Find it today.

Merry Christmas to you in Sri Lanka. Give that monkey a Christmas banana and sing him Jingle Bells while he stares at you in the open shower.

Posted by debutaunt at December 24, 2005 07:25 AM