I agree with Sis #2. Airplane is an excellent movie.
I also agree that God had me watching over that nurse. She's a sweet and funny lady and yes it would have been awful if I had gotten sick or died from her mistake. Which I am sure would have happened considering my blood sugar (at 5am) was 138 with the CORRECT dose. Imagine how bad it would have been if I had received five times the dose.
I love her, but my patient advocate has been called.
I think Sis #1 also got me the hookup with a big room. I move today around 5 or 6. I'm glad now I didn't unpack. Heh. Yay for Sis #1. I'm going to get three windows instead of one. She also got me my new apartment. It's way nice. Two bedrooms. I hate that everyone has to go to the trouble of moving me, but it will be nice when we don't have to get stuck in mega traffic to get to my appointments as I will be less than a mile away from the hospital.
Today I had a female technician draw on my boobies. See. I knew I'd end up with some type of tattoo here. Too bad it's just a bunch of dots and lines around where my debu_lungs are.
Apparently your lungs can only take so much radiation. So they x-ray you and the doctor creates something called a lung block to keep them safe. I like this. But I did not like laying on this hard table with my boobs hanging out. I also insisted on not sitting in the hall and the tech let me sit in the radiation room. Much better.
I'm still feeling ok. I went on a mega walk around the floor this afternoon. One of the nurses said I was going to set a record. I then took a really long shower. I have a wee bit of ouchie belly (as Zoe would say), but that is to be expected. I really wish I could eat some chocolate right now. But my blood sugars are pretty high from the steroids, so I've been not eating very much. Chocolate is so not on the list. I do have some Altoids Cherry Sugar Free gum. It's good stuff. Too bad I don't know where it is packed. But I will soon when I *hee* unpack in my big room.
I got more iTunes bucks from Ms. Kristen B. *smooches*. Now I miss my wireless more than ever. I'm thinking I'm going to have to save these until I get home. So far my favorite new add was Ben Harper's "Welcome to the Cruel World." One of the few albums worth buying the whole thing. Very listenable. Is that a word?
Speaking of words, I have totally called someone a "pisher" before. I never knew what that meant, but I liked it then and I like it even more now. I like my Yiddish lessons. I need to write them down on one big list. Then I can use them more frequently.
I can do this. And will be doing this in a BIGGER room.
Your assignment today is a repeat. I am craving fresh fruits and veggies, which are completely off of my list because of the risk of bacteria. So today I want you to eat some greens and/or something super yummy and in season.
Ok. I Googled and find it funny that the Crisco site has what fruits are in season. Isn't Crisco basically lard?
Posted by debutaunt at February 22, 2006 02:36 PMHooray! They're sending you to the Presidential Suite, as befits the Queen of Delft! Sorry about the boobies-flailing-on-the-table thing, but at least you weren't in the hallway...! Woo-hoo! So, my fight-or-flight adrenaline rush can take a break now for a few minutes. I was very concerned and feeling quite protective of you yesterday. I'm still concerned and feeling quite protective of you, but I no longer have the nearly uncontrollable urge to bash a nursing administrator or something. I shall celebrate your new room, and new apartment, and pray that your patient advocate will fight your in-hospital battles so you don't have to waste precious energy and can focus on fighting what you have to. Your only mission is to get well. And I can't wait until you do. I can picture it so clearly!
Posted by: eclectic at February 22, 2006 03:46 PMOh, goodie! I get to be first! Just went and had some wonderfulo sushi and grapefruit for you! Thinking of a praying for you today. I think we should do the virtual "stomp on cancer's head" dance today, maybe to "Not my Goodies!" Whadda' ya' think? You in?
Posted by: Benita at February 22, 2006 03:48 PMdog gone it! Eclectic got here first!
Posted by: Benita at February 22, 2006 03:48 PMWhy is it that the hospitals completely forget you're a person and therefore are entitled to some dignity? Did I ever tell you about the time I went to the ER because we suspected I had ruptured a cyst on my ovary? Well, you can imagine the wonder device they use to make that kind of diagnosis. Well, the tech inserts this device, which is so unbelieveable big (what guy invented that thing?) sees the blood in my abdominal cavity and says, "Wait here, I've got to go get my boss!" AND SHE WALKS OUT OF THE ROOM! Leaving me with this gargantuan thang up my tooshie (I think that's a yiddish word!). I'm struggling to remove it when the "boss" comes in, a man, and I'm spread eagled, with my hands on this thang trying to remove it...the whole site had to be an image from an X-rated movie, I swear! I was so embarrassed. I learned to be very vocal and stand up for ME that day! But the image of the boobies with the drawings had me going there!
Talked with Sis #2--you got a lot of peeps moving in your family. What, are you all part gypsies?
I want to create a sign for you, one you can pass out to the "over-worked, going through the motions, got my mind on other matters, can't get to all the paperwork I need to do" personas that you come in contact with that aren't exactly "in the moment" with your care. They do something stupid, and you can go, "Here you go, here's your sign!" I'm going to get to work on that right now. "Tappy shoes are not happy shoes, I think" (a line from "Junie B., First Grader Boss of Lunch" by Barbara Park)
I put your name into the prayer basket at my bible study this morning. We all said a prayer for you and Zoe at that moment, as well. Did you feel the love? We were certainly sending it your way!
Denise :)
Posted by: Denise at February 22, 2006 05:06 PMMy intellectual curiousity is completely wasted. I actually looked up on line how they did the shit going in the fan scene in Airplane.
It is bean dip. Launched from an air mortar.
This is what I read: "The most startling revelation is in the "shit hit the fan" gag: The first attempt with an air mortar full of bean dip missed and hit actor Stephen Stucker square in the chest ... and he reportedly freaked out."
Stephen Stucker is the hat, broach, teradactyl guy.
It is too bad that computer generated effects are replacing a lot of what the special effects guys do because computer stuff just doesn't seem real a lot of the time. It is almost too perfect.
Bean dip. heh.
Posted by: Sis#1 at February 22, 2006 05:20 PMHey just checking up on you again. I will eat a big salad with greens,onions,carrots,tomatos,cucumbers,grilled chicken, avacados and sprouts. The dressing is chili cilantro yum. I stop at this drive thur on the way home from work called Baby Greens. It is a drive thru salad palce. Cool huh. See, not all drive thrus are crappy fast food. My cousin's husband is one of the administrators at MD Anderson. Should I tell him to come see you and make sure the nurses are not smoking crack before their shift starts.
Posted by: poody at February 22, 2006 06:55 PMJust checking in with you sweetie. I'm glad you're getting a bigger room. The Queen totally needs her space!
Posted by: Traci at February 22, 2006 10:09 PMI'm so glad you called your patient advocate. Nice nurse or not...that was a horrid mistake! I'm so happy you are getting a bigger room, and they don't leave you in the hall anymore. Patient Dignity is the most important thing. Glad it has been a day of good things for you!
Posted by: Jeanette, Christine's Mom at February 22, 2006 10:51 PMDeb, each Monday I publish the best jokes I have received in my emails during the previous week. Here are a few from last Monday’s blog.
According to a news report, a certain school in Garden City, MI was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the washroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day, the girls would put them back.
Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. He called all the girls to the washroom and met them there with the maintenance man. He explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, he asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
THE MORAL OF THIS STORY: There are teachers, and then there are Educators.
The first of the baby-boomers are starting to turn sixty-years old. In honor of that occasion, a number of popular songs of our era are in the process of being revised to reflect conditions of the present day. They include:
1. Herman's Hermits -- Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker
2. The Bee Gees -- How Can You Mend a Broken Hip
3. Bobby Darin -- Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash
4. The Beatles -- I Get By With a Little Help From Depends
5. Roberta Flack -- The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face
6. Johnny Nash -- I Can't See Clearly Now
7. Paul Simon -- Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver
8. Commodores -- Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom
9. Marvin Gaye -- Heard it through the Grape Nuts
10. The Temptations -- Papa's Got a Kidney Stone
11. Abba -- Denture Queen
12. Helen Reddy -- I am Woman, Hear Me Snore
13. Willie Nelson -- On the Commode Again
14. Leslie Gore -- It's My Procedure and I'll Cry if I Want to
An American is having breakfast, in Paris, one morning (coffee, croissants, bread, butter and jam) when a Frenchman, chewing bubble-gum, sits down next to him. The American ignores the Frenchman who, nevertheless, starts a conversation.
Frenchman: "You American folk eat the whole bread??"
American (in a bad mood): "Of course."
Frenchman: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We don't. In France, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them into croissants and sell them to the states" The Frenchman has a smirk on his face.
The American listens in silence
The Frenchman persists: "Do you eat jelly with the bread??"
American: "Of Course."
Frenchman: (cracking his bubble-gum between his teeth and chuckling). "We don't. In France we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam, and sell the jam to the states."
After a moment of silence, The American then asks: "Do you have sex in France?"
Frenchman: "Why of course we do", he says with a big smirk.
American: "And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?"
Frenchman: "We throw them away, of course."
American: "We don't. In America, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into bubble-gum, and sell them to France."
The following questions from lawyers were taken from official court records nationwide.
1. Was that the same nose you broke as a child?
2. Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning?
3. Q: What happened then? A: He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me." Q: Did he kill you?
4. Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?
5. The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
6. Were you alone or by yourself?
7. How long have you been a French Canadian?
8. Do you have any children or anything of that kind?
9. Q: I show you exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture.
A: That's me.
Q: Were you present when that picture was taken?
10. Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?
11. Q: Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
12. Q: Do you know how far pregnant you are now?
A: I'll be three months on November
8. Q: Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?
A: Yes.
Q: What were you doing at that time?
13. Q: Mrs. Jones, do you believe you are emotionally stable?
A: I used to be.
Q: How many times have you committed suicide?
14. So you were gone until you returned?
15. Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there girls?
16. You don't know what it was, and you didn't know what it looked like, but can you describe it?
17. Q: You say that the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?
18. Q: Have you lived in this town all your life?
A: Not yet.
19. A Texas attorney, realizing he was on the verge of unleashing a stupid question, interrupted himself and said, "Your Honor, I'd like to strike the next question."
20. Attny: Do you recall approximately the time that you examined the body of Mr. Edington at the Rose Chapel?
Witness: It was in the evening. The autopsy started about 8:30 p.m.
Attny: And Mr. Edington was dead at the time, is that correct?
Witness: No, you stupid ass, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy!
Attny: I object.
Judge: To what?
Attny: The witness called me a “stupid ass.”
Judge: Over ruled.