debutaunt.com

I love you Deb.

Queen

It sucks when you are betrayed, but whatever
it was you DID NOTHING to deserve whatever it was.

NOTHING DEB. I figure if I write in CAPS you may
hear me better:)

Nothing but nothing is going to change the course
of you kicking cancers ass.

You can quote me on that little MISSIE. (I love
calling people little MISSIE).

I hope you know how much we all love you.

Bowing to my Queen

Love
Shoshanna
(I use the full name when I mean business)

The Yiddish Yoda Master

PS. You can cry-but you can't go into any holes.
mmmmkay....you might find a racoon in a hole...

Queens do not crawl into holes.

Love,
Shoshie

That sucks. I am so sorry.

Incidentally, I am available to kick someone's ass if they need it. Just say the word.

There is no way you did anything to deserve this. Please remove that thought from your mind. Why bad things happen to good people is a question for which we'll never have the answer.

I am so sorry this happened, but please in no way blame yourself. Prayers and love coming your way.

Something you did, Deb? I don't think so. My Queen, it probably is that you're a vulnerable target more than anything else. Sign me up with Busy Mom, I'll happily help deliver a similarly crappy day to whoever it is that needs a smackdown on your behalf.

Your life at this moment may not seem so great but the life you're headed toward will be so hunker down and get through the suckfest moments for now. We're cheering you on and handing out the tissues, hoping to be a reservoir of strength and hope for you. Big, big healing hugs for you.{{{{{{Queen Deb}}}}}}

good god. i don't know what it was, but i'm sure you didn't deserve it. i hope tomorrow looks brighter. and every day after that.

(((Deb))) I'm so sorry.

I usually lurk, but this just made me sad and angry that someone would hurt you, so I had to leave a comment.

I don't know what happened, but I know for certain you did not cause it and you did not deserve it. As said above, people know you are vulnerable and healing right now, so they decide to be shits.

Hugs to you, dear one.
Jessica

Oh Deb,

Betrayal can be the worst kind of pain to bear. It goes right against anything you would ever do and because it's so inconceivable to some of us, it feels like a knife between the shoulder blades. And I'm sure that it feels like just one last straw after all the strength you're needing to fight this Kanker-butt.

Just know that we hear you and if we could, we'd share your pain, in fact carry it for you, a million times over. Know that you are loved and supported on all sides. Yes that doesn't take the pain away. Nothing will. I've learnt that the ONLY way I could bear the worst times was to just not resist them. I understand that you have to resist the cancer. You feel the way out is to fight with all your might. I can't speak from the remotest bit of experience on that score.
But I do know that when heart-ache and deep wounding happens to me, I only get through it when I surrender to the fact that it IS, and that I cannot take it away.
If I resist it and try to wrestle away from the reality, I stay wound up and feeling JUST as you described. There comes a point where I just have to turn the tables and say ok, this is what is. What now?

Much love and care
Jeanne

For the past 3 weeks my husband and I have been on the receiving end of some fairly heavy betrayal as well. It takes your breath away and makes the entire world feel heavy on your chest. I'm sorry. Today I'm just in the mood for kicking someone/thing in the ass for you, so you just name the place and target. Call me Guido.

I'm imagining all sorts of things that it could be, and none of them are very good. So I'll just tell you that I'm sending you lots of love, and I'm here for you if you need to rant. You've got my digits and my e-mail, and I'm only a short drive away.

Don't know who or why, but know you didn't do anything to deserve it! Some people just aren't happy unless they are trying to ruin someone else's day!

Please don't give them the satisfaction of dwelling on it!

Hugs and warm thoughts for you...

alan

you have a good cry and then tell us all about it...or not...
I am praying that you do not mean you were betrayed by your health, by the transplant...I am hoping that someone terrible needs an ass kicking, cause I am in the mood to kick some ass.
some
major
ass.

Deb
I am so sorry that someone decided it was OK to stomp on your heart.
Some people just suck. There is nothing you can do about those types of people, but protect your self. "Fool you once shame on them, fool you twice shame on you". (an old quote from my mother)
Your a good, kind and compasionate person and some ass holes like to take advantage of good people.
I'm sorry your are hurting. And I'm sorry you have to hurl pizza and broccoli soup.......how bad was that.
I'm thinking of you
hope you day get better
nancy

Deb darling!

You did nothing to deserve this! I am here for you - any time - nite or day. I am in the mood for some ass kicking! This was so not right I still have a hard time believing it.

Do not give up - you will make it through this and all your treatments. In the end it will make you stronger.

We all love you!

d

Deb,
I am with the rest of your kingdom on everything that has been said here today. I read
this and I am seething. 99% of humans are really
decent people. 1% are bad apples. Most people
at some point in their lives are betrayed by
someone. Look in your heart, and see all the
people that love you. Hopefully that will ease
the pain of the betrayal. You do know that no
human deserves to be betrayed, you are no exception. As hard as it may be, think of all
the people that love you both in real life and
here. I hope you find some comfort in knowing
"we" would do anything for you. Give yourself
a big hug today from "us".

Love,
Nikki

Bad things DO NOT happen because we deserve them. They happen just because they do. Good things and bad things happen regardless of what type of lives we lead. It's just the way it is.

Don't take it on yourself. Whoever did whatever they did is not worth the energy. All of your energy must be focused on drop-kicking cancer right out the door.

You don't deserve any of this - but then, who does?? Nobody!

I'm sorry someone doesn't realize how lucky they are to have you. We do. Focus on the positive, okay?

xoxo

NO! You love your life. You love LIFE WITH ZOE. Your particular moment isn't so hot,but the future with your beloved girl is bright and shiny and just over there- see it? Oh yeah- there it is! The shiny pink glittery thing.

Go get that glittery thing, Deb. it's waiting for you - the rest of your wonderful merry life lived out with your wonderful Zoe and so many more adventures to take.

You're almost there, Deb. YOU CAN DO THIS.

Sweetie... oh no... you are in my heart and mind and prayers today. May karma COMPLETELY kick the ass of whoever or whatever it was that did what he/she/it did to make you feel this way.

You surely don't deserve this.

Hey Deb-

I know I don't comment often, but I felt I should comment today.

This past year I learned in a big way all about betrayal. And I know that these experiences are suppose to make us stronger. And sure, today, looking back, I can say I'm a stronger, smarter Some Girl.

Yet still, the depth of despair that I felt when the bottom fell out and I was just there and blind sided, I remember that feeling all too well.

So, my best to you, my thoughts (even thought my comments have been scarce) have always been with you. My next trip to Houston will have to incorporate a Debu/Some Girl Fiesta.

Betrayal is right up on the scale of worst feelings in the world. Right beneath it is throwing up pizza and broccoli though, oh my, bad combo. (I myself just recently throwing up some choice stuff too)

Here's to karma kicking them in the ass, and to you feeling better.

To me, betrayal is one of the worst things that can happen to someone. I don't believe, not even for a minute that you did ANYTHING to cause it. Deb, I've never met a more self-LESS, caring, giving, loving, and positive person than YOU. We all love you girl. Give us your pain, there are a lot of us and we can take it. You focus on getting better and being with Zoe. I can't imagine anyone hurting you. Give us Peeps the word and we will take care of them for you. Sometimes crying can heal but Shosie is right; Queens don't crawl into holes; They ORDER other people to crawl into the holes!

Cami

I don't know if anyone mentioned it before, but you might think about renting "What the BLEEP do we know?" There is a very influential part where they show molecules of water that have been subjected to love, hate, etc. The love molecules looked like snowflakes, and the hate molecules looked like pizza and broccoli soup throw up.

It may have been a load of bull, but I believe love heals. Love yourself, Deb, and you will kick cancers fuckin' ass. Don't let anyone get in the way of that.

What kind of fucktard decides to kick someone while they are down? That makes me so angry. What was so gotdamn important that someone couldn't keep his or her piehole shut for a bit?

Deb, whomever is capable of something like that simply does not even need be allowed in your presence, ever.

But, cry it out - feel it and then let go of all of that negative energy. I'd give you a great big hug and foot massage if I could right now.

Internet hugs to ya (((hugs))).

Deb, I'm so sorry. Whatever happened feels so awful right now, but somehow it will work out to your benefit in the long run. I've been there. I guarantee this is true.

Don't sweat losing the broccoli soup and the pizza. They were used, anyway, and rather unattractive.

Smile. Okay, pretend to smile. Hugs. (I will send tickles, if necessary. You've already told us that Zoe can manage that nicely.)

I am so sorry you are having a bad day. Hang in there and think of your Zoe.

You can do this!!!! I know you can!!!

Thinking of you . . . praying for you

Ok, who's arse do I need to kick?

Deb, I'm tired of words this morning. You've got a whole collection of really great ones already here, and I hope some of them are sinking in... but none of them -- when everything's said and done -- will make whatever you're facing and experiencing go away.

Dammit words! They're all we have, but they're just so fucking inadequate.

But not you. You are NOT inadequate. You are MORE THAN ENOUGH for anything you have to go through. I'm sorry that you are having to, but I know that you can. You will push Zoe on the swingset, you will laugh at her performance in the school play, you will dance at her wedding... and when you do we will all turn and flip the bird at cancer because it fucking tackled more than it could handle when it decided to fuck with you. My launguage goes gutter when I'm pissed off, and I could edit it right now before I press "Post", but I'm just so dammit tired of words. So I'll let you read my heart instead.

Betrayal hurts. So Sorry for you sweetheart. Move on and don't let it get you down.

Deb,

If only bad things happened to people because they did something to deserve it... If only.

My heart aches for you that you've been hurt by anything or anyone. I'm sending positive energy your way and keeping you in my prayers today and every day.

I'm in on the ass-kicking posse.

Circus Kelli comment was great. I've seen the movie and agree. Even if it was bull, love heals. IT DOES. LOOK AT THE LOVE YOU HAVE!! Holy Moo Cow Licking!

What Kris said- if only bad things happened to people because they did something to deserve it....if only!!!! Oh Lord, IF ONLY! In time, they will get their's. I believe that.

You are the Queen, and will continue to be the Queen. Do what you need to do to heal. We're here. We all love you.

Love,
Dawn

sociopath (soh-see-uh-path, soh-shee-uh-path)

"Someone whose social behavior is extremely abnormal. Sociopaths are interested only in their personal needs and desires, without concern for the effects of their behavior on others."

Did you know that sociopaths are so adept at lying that they can fool lie detectors? It makes them hard to detect.

It is too damn bad that as a society we can tattoo this word on sociopath's foreheads as a warning to others.

I know you feel like crap about this now but better to know now than later. I am a big believer in turning lemons into lemonade--that you can learn and later prosper from bad shit happening to you. It doesn't make it feel any better when you are going through it, but know that it will get better and you will smite this as you smote everything else in your path.

I'm available to pound someone as well. This has nothing to do with you. Whatever whoever did just shows that that "whoever" is a venal, slimeball, pussbucket sub-amoeba.

Kill Bill 3.

The lovely protagonist, mother of a cute girl is in a fight against the cancers. She faces much adversity that tries to take her away from her much beautimus daughter. Eventually, she gets completely tooled by a *@#&%$*%& betrayer.

She gets even by getting a book deal. The End.

I tried. I like how in the Kill Bill movies the mom ends up with the little girl. :)

I hope whatever happened was some kind of person or entity that will be able to experience karmic retribution. When I have been betrayed I console myself dreaming up all kinds of wonderful scenarios. But, then again, it's a weird two-edged sword. Because if the betrayers are subject to karmic retribution, that's what leads us to believe we must have done something to deserve the betrayal. Hmmm, I don't call myself Philosophical Karen for nothing...

But I don't feel like this is being very helpful. Time to switch gears...

Deb, I am filled with empathy for you. I *know* that feeling of betrayal. It isn't fun, but it also isn't forever. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

{{{{Hugs to you.}}}}

I usually spend my time haunting stubborn game show producers, but just point me in the direction of the offenders and I'll haunt them to the ends of the Earth!

But what are you doing eating the disgusting weed, broccoli, when you're trying to get better? ;)

It feels bad, and sometimes it is best to just go on and feel bad. And then sometime, you realize you don't feel bad anymore.

Yay!

If you would like to be distracted, I recommend nonrevenge fantasies. I recommend Dexy's Midnight Runners and "Come On Eileen." There is a glissando thingy at the beginning, where they slide the hand down the piano keyboard, that makes me feel like I can kick anything's ass. Or, more to the point, it makes me feel as if I have already kicked ass.

This too shall pass. Makes us stronger. All that. It's true. Ten years from now you will not remember this, or if you do, you will know it made you stronger.

Be well. Onward.

Skoop

Being betrayed has nothing to do with you - nothing - nada - nyet - bubkas - No thing. It has to do with the idiot who did the betraying.

I know it doesn't feel that way right now, but maybe.... just maybe, someday, you will see it and laugh your ass off at the idiot who could be so small. If the idiot has a penis - it just got smaller. It the idiot has breasts, they just sagged more than they were already sagging - trust me.

It's true.

So many before me have already said it, but I have to chime in, because you're too wonderful a person for me to just let someone hurting you slide.

This was not something you deserved. This was not something you could have prevented. Everyone has the capacity to be cruel, just as much as the capacity to be kind, and we have little to no control over which option anyone will choose. People lash out because of their own pain and anger. People treat each other badly out of thoughtlessness. And, sometimes, people are just mean, vicious, malicious bastards.

Know that we are here for you. Know that you are surrounded, both here on the internet, and in your non-web life, by people who love you. People who respect you. People who are praying for you, and sending you well wishes.

Most importantly, there's Zoe. Precious Zoe. You can do this. You can do this in spite of pain, in spite of anger, in spite of betrayal.

You can do this.

I am sorry to hear that someone did something so terrible. Don't let them win. Just think of Zoe and her last visit with you.

whoever used the word "fucktard" was so right.

the internets are your strong and powerful regime. the internets are full of sleep-deprived mommas who need a place to unleash their ass-kicking deb_u_blackbelt uma-inspired fury.

consider me your newest recruit in the army of deb_u_asskick.

(or, in other words, deb, you kick ass and deserve all the best there is in life. this person, whoever s/he may be, is not worthy of your time and affection because s/he is a fucktard sociopath (thanks to your sis for that insight!)and you don't need him/her.)

focus on zoe and your wonderful extended family and on kicking cancer's big fat ass.

Coming out of lurk-dom to say that Im so sorry that someone has hurt you, that sucks and THEY suck donkey-balls. Just focus on yourself and getting better for you and your beautiful Zoe.

Awwww, Deb...I am so sorry. Whomever did this to you deserves to have their ass kicked for sure. I know you've had tons of offers to do just that in all the comments I just finished reading however, I also know that since my mom died 7 weeks ago, I have been one angry bitch. I'm primed and ready to kick SOMEBODY'S ass so let me at them! I pray you will find some peace with this my dear. I recently (as in the past 7 months) have also lived with some internets betrayal...tough stuff and again, I am so sorry. It's hard to do however please find that peaceful place inside you and focus on healing honey. Whomever did this is not worth your breath...or your life my dear.

i ahve no idea what's going on, but Deb's Army is out here and ready to kick some butt. So you just focus on kicking cancer's butt, we'll take care of the rest.
xo

I'm sorry, hon, for whatever has happened.

I have a friend here who does karate. Want us to do some ass-kicking? I can sling a Coach bag like no one else.

((((HUGS))))