debutaunt.com

You need to do whatever it takes to heal yourself. Physically...emotionally...mentally...

Be well

Get better Deb, I will keep praying for you to regain your strength with all my heart and I will miss you every day but know you are healing..love you for all that you have shared, Yasmin in Melbourne, Australia

Take care, please know you remain in my thoughts and prayers.

I'll be thinking of you...and holding you close while you do what you need to.
you have my prayers.

I completely understand. You come first. Always. Take care and may you heal your mind, body, and spirit.

De-lurking to say I've been reading for a few months. Am amazed at your strength. Take care of yourself.

You are disappointing no one. We want you to be well, whatever it takes.

You're dealing with a lot of changes right now. Do what you have to do. *It's all about you right now.*

Be well. I'll be thinking about you and hoping you are okay.

I feel like I know you and wish I could give a hug. Please take care of yourself and do what you need to heal. You owe us nothing--we want the best for you.

Deb,
You can give up on your blog, but you must take
care of you. I leave 3/31/06 for my DWB trip.
Please take care, you have come so far. Whatever
is breaking your heart, don't let it break your
spirit.

You will survive your A.L.L. I am
counting on you for the Sarah's and the Eric's
in the world. YOU CAN DO THIS.

We love you Deb,
Nikki

You and Zoe come first. Take care of yourself, take care of her, and do what you need to heal. And if you decide to come back, we'll be here.

You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

Blog or no blog, you are in my heart and my thoughts. You CAN do this, but it's normal to feel like you can't from time to time. You ARE doing this, even though it's completely understandable that you don't want to.

You have something special, Deb, and because of it, discouragement will never be able to keep you down... not for long, at least. You're a beautiful person, inside and out. I'll miss you while you're healing -- physically and emotionally -- but I look forward to having you back with the big announcement that cancer had to tuck it's butt-ugly tail and run. You have my loyalty forever, no matter what my extraordinary Queen.
love,
~Shari

Deb,
I have read what you wrote a few times. The
last line you wrote. You have never disappointed
us. You have to take care of you, and Zoe. As
Eclectic said if you change your mind, people
will be here for you.
You are our hero, you are beautiful inside and
out. We all want what is best for you. Blog or
no blog, you will be in my heart forever.

Love,
Nikki

It's time to focus on you. Do that, this time is really hard. Learning to live again without the 24 hour care of the hospital is very scary, but you can.

Even without the daily words of your blog, you shall be in my heart and prayers.

All this love goes with you, stays with you, is here when you come back. All these prayers continue, they don't stop or even slow down. Listen to you and what you need to do. Much love to you, Deb. And thank you for all that you've given us here. For making our lives better. You have absolutely done that. That remains, too.

Debuma,
You have given so much to all of us. You have
made me laugh, cry, and I found a new "kewl"
friend. I am like a pesty fly, I will never go
away. I will look for you every day in case
you change your mind.
I have an assignment for you. The Yiddish Yoda
Master wants you to take care of you, and your
heart. Close your eyes and feel all this love
we have for you. When you crave candy, and say
OY VEY, know that is Sarah, and moi talking
to you. You have made a real difference in my
life, you have helped all of us.
Wear you boa, wave your wand, and know you
have a bajiliion loyal subjects here.

Love,
Shoshie

Deb, I don't know you well, except through your blog and the exceptional things others have said about you. I want you to know that your words have caused me to examine things in my own life, what is important and what is not, and I thank you for that. Time to not worry about anything anymore, just take care of yourself. May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

I've been a lurker for a bit and I'm probably going to get some "hate" mail about what I'm going to write but frankly I don't care. Everyone has been nice and supportive; sending love, money and prayers to you and yours and I'll be damned if I'm going to allow you to have a pity party NOW when you are SO close to ending this particular chapter and verse in your life on a HAPPY note. From the tone of your entry you're contemplating "quitting." Quitting what I don't know... quitting life? Quitting blogging? I'll take the approach that you want to drop out all together... Simply put: You CANNOT quit now. Period. If not for anything else, you've got a beautiful little girl that YOU gave life to, that has eagerly waited for YOU while you've been sick and that desparately misses her Momma. Get to that little girl that you gave life to, gave your heart to; get to your family that has been so supportive in all the ways that mean something. THAT is your priority. So someone deceived you and broke your heart... you can cry later. Comfort can lay in the fact that Karma ALWAYS provides those who need it with a swift kick in the 'nads.
You are a strong, independent and fiercely determined woman--don't let anyone allow you to be distracted or lose sight of that. YOU CAN DO THIS and YOU WILL DO THIS. No other option is acceptable (YOU said this... I'm simply reminding you). If this has angered you, good-- you can come kick my ass later and I'll look forward to the beatin'.

oh deb. holding you and zoe and your amazing family in my heart.
xo

We will miss you, but you gotta do what ya gotta do! Love you, hun!

Deb,
I hope you can find peace in this troubling time for you. Like I said before you are an inspriation to me, you've made a diff in my life.
I like your, Jewish Mama, will check in every day and hope your spirit is mended.
Remember the book the Four Agreements, i don't go for all the religous undertones but the 4 agreements have helped me a great deal. If you haven't read it, give it a try. Its says it like it is. Keep the "pocket tokens" i sent you with you or near you and maybe it will bring you luck and happiness.
take care
Peace, Prayers and Love
Nancy

Hello Houston,

See I told "ya" I would check on you. I hope
today is a better day. I sure hope when you go
to your 379 appts. today they go fast. Bring a
People magazine so you know who is doing what.
All the really impt. stuff in life (ha ha).
Don't forget to wear the boa, so they know you
are THE QUEEN.
Have you bounced on your own bed yet-you know
using it like some trampoline.
All "yolks aside"-we love you Queen.

Shoshie

I am still holding class here. The Yiddish phrase
of the day is gay avek which means go away or
get lost. Just don't use that phrase with me.

XOXOXOXOX

We love you and will be with you whether you are posting or not. Take care of yourself. *HUGS*

Good luck to you in whatever you do. I have been reading for a couple of months and honestly think of you every time I hear anything about the horrible Dracula Blood. You are strong, and even when people hurt you, you will always get through it. It just sucks for awhile and that's okay. Something better will happen. You just have to hang on for it. Please stay well.

Deb, You have never been, nor will ever be a disappointment. Just because you close the blog, doesn't mean I won't be thinking of you, and praying for you. Take care, hon. I wish you nothing but the best.

Oh Deb - do what you need to do for yourself and darling Zoe. You are NEVER a disappointment; you are an INSPIRATION to everyone.

We love you and want only the very best for you. You are in our hearts, thoughts and prayers.

You kick ass, my dear. I hope one day to be as ass-kicking as you are.

Deb,

Take care of youself and that wonderful little angel zoe. I love you and you will be on my heart and I hope that one day I log on to your blog.

xoxo,

loryss

Deb, I hope you find what you are looking for. For someone who's so discriptive and clear you seem to have left this entry very fuzzy. I think I speak for everyone when I say, I hope it's just the blogging you are giving up on. Our life situations only have the power that we give them. I know this feels bad, now. Why focus on one persons feelings about you and not the mass of people who are here for you everyday reading, commenting, praying, loving, crying, laughing... all for Deb, "The Queen". Don't discount the strength you've geaned from us "internets". I will miss you and hope you will change your mind about closing the door on this group of supporters. We care... it's you we are here for.

((HUGS))

Take care of yourself. I'll be thinking about you. Just let us know when you have kicked cancer's ass. Mmmmmkay?

Queen, with all due respect, I 'hear' the same tone Kelly does. Thats the thing about typing. Sometimes the 'tone' can get misunderstood; I truly hope i'm misunderstanding and its only about the blog.

That is ok. No one will be disappointed if you stop your blog for a while, until you are ready. We will all be here, waiting to hear from you.

I know what heartache feels like. It does cut deep, and hurts so bad you just cant stand it. It will pass. Kicking cancers ass will pass; but you need to kick it. YOU. We are here for you. We love you. If we could do it for you, I know so many of us would.

I love you !
Dawn

Deb,
I am making a "house-call" :). I hope you
have a sunny day today. Devote every second to
getting better whatever it takes. You can do
this. I know you can. I wish I could write you
the perfect Rx to heal all your sorrow. I can't
do that but I can offer you my hand. You hold
my hand here in cyber space, and I won't let
you go unitl you have kicked cancer.

Love,
Nikki

A big Hi if they read to Sis 1 and 2.

Deb,

I wish you well. You're in my thoughts and my prayers.

I will keep checking on you, praying for you and sending you good vibes. Whatever it takes to heal your heart, body and spirit just do it. I've had my heart broken and remember the pain all too well and am so very sorry you have to go through this as well as kicking cancer's ass. I do know that you WILL make it though and I'll be anxious to hear about better days when you are ready to share again.
Much love and many hugs

hugs and best wishes always..
you do what you need to.. but know we are still out here pullin for ya..
and really.. I wouldn't mess with the SWLF's.. I've heard stories! they are tough!
be well..
biscuit

I don't know what you mean. If you mean just giving up in reference to this blog, than fine - that's fine. If that's what you're talking about, then you should do whatever you have to do to get through this.

But I'm afraid that's not what you mean. And it's not for me that's not acceptable, but for Zoe.

You can't even do it for Zoe??

I don't believe you.

You CAN do it. For you and especially for Zoe. She will not be fine without you. SHE needs you.

Mourn what you lost, and then get right back in the ring. Zoe doesn't deserve any less.

I'll be thinking of you and sending you all my strength, all my courage, and all my love. You can do this. You must do it. Like you said yourself, you have no choice.

You're not "disappointing" anyone. You're doing what you need to do to get better. Sometimes that's a blog, sometimes it's not a blog.

until next time....

Sweetie we will miss you and are dismayed by your last message. Do what you have to do to get better, but know that many faceless but good and kind people are behind you, wishing you well and sending healing thoughts from around the globe. If you want us we will still be here for you when you return. We do not mean to be selfish and suck your energy. Thank you for all you have done for us, you have helped us more than you know. I hope you return someday, but if not always know I will remember you as someone very magical who I was glad to know, if only through your blog. Concentrate only on getting better. Love.

Deb, we believe in you. Take whatever time you need to heal, and become strong again. You'll be in our thoughts and prayers.

Like everyone else has said, you do what you need to for you. A blog should never feel like a chore or cause pain. When it gets in the way of healing, you must step back.

Please know, we are not disappointed. I will continue to think of you daily with or without updates.

Heal yourself - your body, your emotions, your spirit. If you ever feel the urge to blog - we will be here.

I continue to believe that you are going to kick this cancer's ass.

Deb - I wish I knew what was going on to make you feel such despair. Please take care of yourself, and I'll keep you and Zoe in my thoughts and prayers as always.

My thoughts and prayers are with you as you heal. Just remember that no matter what depths you are looking at, you are never alone.

No disappointment here, just hopes and prayers that this allows you to focus on you. And right now, nothing else matters.

Put all the energy into kicking cancer's ass. You can do it!

I found your site yesterday, just after you posted your closed entry. I spent the next two hours reading through your blog and crying - a very common reaction I am sure.

I just wanted to say that I am amazed at all you have been able to endure and I am sending you my thoughts and prayers. I hope you are just taking a short break from your blog and not quitting entirely because from what I read this sounds like a huge part of your healing and therapy. But if it is a burden, then of course, do what you need to do.

As for the latest turmoil you are going through - as all your dear readers are saying, just keep up the fight girl. You will get through it. It just feels like you wont right now. (But since I am just some newbie to your site I know I have no right to say anything. But I hope to see you back and continuing to kick ass while you inspire the blogosphere.)

Just thought I would let you know that I was so inspired by you that i wrote about your site and linked to it on my blog www.5minutesformom.com in an entry called "blogs can be such beautiful things".

Good Luck and God Bless. I will be checking back and I hope to hear about how you kicked this latest bit of ass!

Deb, I hope you are okay. Just do what you need to do. Because of you, I started giving blood; I just donated today. If you can make a perfect stranger, hundreds of miles away, get up and give blood to help another perfect stranger, then you can do anything. Please accept my best wishes to you and yours. I know that whatever happens, you will be fine.

Now on my fridge is a photograph of a beautiful, courageous woman and her delightful daughter. Do you know how often I go to the fridge? Have you seen my thighs? If I weren't thinking of you often enough already, I surely will now. More prayers, more love. Uhoh, I gotta go get an old R&B song for you. Back in a sec.

OK, it's time for some Smokey (Robinson, that is), and that means some serious lovin'. I know Shoshie will sing along with me, and this is dedicated to you from everyone here who loves you:

MORE LOVE

Let it be soon, don't hesitate
Make it now, don't wait
Open your heart and let my love come in
I want the moment to start when I can fill your heart with

More love, and more joy
Than age or time could ever destroy
My love is so sound
It would take a hundred lifetimes
To live it down, wear it down, tear it down

This is no fiction
This is no act
This is real, it's fact
I'll always belong only to you
Each day I'll be living to make sure I'm giving you

More love and more joy
Than age or time could ever destroy
And my love is so sound
It'll take about a hundred lifetimes
To live it down, wear it down, tear it down

As we grow older no need to fear
When you need me I'll be here
I'll be beside you every step of the way
With A heart that's truthful and keeping you youthful with

More love, more joy
Than age or time can ever destroy
And my love is so sound
It'll take about a hundred lifetimes
To live it down, wear it down, tear it down

Smokey Robinson is extremely therapeutic. With or without The Miracles.

Deb...delurking to say I wish you all the best and hope you come back here somewhere in the near future and inform us that you went all Uma on that cancer and it's gone.

Until then, give up the blog, but don't give up fighting for your life. It's hard and man, I am impressed you hadn't shown a break in that incredible armor you have until now. But you can do it...you've come this far, you can go the distance.

I am hoping for you all the best and wishing that you kick cancer's ass. I'll be checking back for that big party announcement!

All the best
Cyndy

Not a problem, Deb. I'll miss coming here to check on you but you've made it past some incredible milestones and you'll make it past this one, too. I have little doubt that you'll rebound but I know these things take time. Regroup, refocus, and when the time comes to re-emerge, you'll be stronger and more able to sniff out and send poseurs back to crawl under the rock from whence they came.

I thought of mentioning this earlier, but I want to let you know that a visit to your digs here is equivalent to a trip into quite an incredible crowd of diverse folks. When time allowed in my surfing, I thoroughly enjoyed visiting the links to other commentor's pages. What a blessing that common ground can be found in caring for someone most of us have never met. You drew crowds of strangers into a circle of 'friends' just by being you. That's a pretty amazing gift. Thank you for including me.

I am going to check Debs blog each day. I am not
saying she should change her mind, or will change
her mind. But in the event she does, I would hate
to miss out on what the Queen has to say.

I think so many people have said so many great
things. What Cody's Mom wrote is so true. Deb
you drew together a bunch of strangers and
now it's like the DEBUCLUB.

I know you are going to kick cancer in the ass.
I am going to be here in case you share it
with us.

Love
Shoshie

Hey I will be back with a song. Susie and I
are going to tour this summer. We may be
coming to your "citay" and we will shake
our booteeeeeeeeeeeees.

OMG thank God my kids don't read blogs.

Ok off to get my song.

OK here is my first song for you Deb.

Lucky Star
written by Madonna

-------------------------
You must be my Lucky Star
'Cause you shine on me wherever you are
I just think of you and I start to glow
And I need your light
And baby you know

Chorus:

Starlight, starbright first star I see tonight
Starlight, [starbright] make everything all right
Starlight, starbright first star I see tonight
Starlight, [starbright] yeah

You must be my Lucky Star
'Cause you make the darkness seem so far
And when I'm lost you'll be my guide
I just turn around and you're by my side

(chorus)

Come on shine your heavenly body tonight
'Cause I know you're gonna make everything all right

You may be my lucky star
But I'm the luckiest by far
-------------------------------------------------
OK and I can sing this just like Madonna, I am
that good. Bwahahahahahahaha

Shoshie
The YIDDISH YODA MASTER

Oy I have one more song, And this song really
says it well. So for My Queen I will sing this
song.

-People- and I sound just like Ms. Streisand,
I am so versatile in my singing.

People
People who need people
Are the luckiest people in the world

We're children needing other children
And yet, letting our grown up pride
Hide all the need inside
Acting more like children than children

People
God's children
Were born to be free
To love
All people have a dream
For peace, for security
Let the world fall in love again
Please, please, let our lies not be in vain

Lovers are very special people
They're the luckiest people in the world
With one person
One very special person
A feeling deep in your soul says
You were half, now you're whole

No more hunger and thirst
But first be a person who needs people
People who need people
Are the luckiest people in the world

OK I hope Deb and everone else has one of
these songs stuck in your head for at least
a week. Humm and think of Deb our soon to
be cancer free Queen.

Susie and I take requests it's 25 cents per
song. We are really that good.

Shoshie. How damned OLD are you, whipping out the People, for heaven's sake. Oh, wait, I went back to when Smokey was with the Miracles. Yea, no, never mind.

You sound GOOOOOD, Shoshie. We can get 30 cents a song, EASY. I'm working on my moves for the tour; I hope you're getting in shape, too. We will totally come to Deb's ci-tay. And give her and Zoe a backstage pass, too :)

You think Nikki will do a live satellite solo appearance from Cambodia?

You are loved by so many. I think of you daily and even though you are not blogging right now, I will still come here daily in hopes you have posted something new.

Take time to heal, we will be here waiting.

Ok its 50 cents a song. The Queen and Zoe will
be dancers on stage when we go to HOUSTON.

I am sure our "peeps" can hook Nikki up with
something, I mean she is like "that good".
And whoa can she ever shake her "booteeeeeeee".

Susie I am 21 bwahahahahaha

Shoshie
The Yiddish Yoda Master
Singer for All

I know it's been said...but do what you have to do. Focus on getting better and that sweet darling of yours. We'll still be here if/when you get back, whenever that is.

Love from Vancouver, eh.

Wait, if Shoshie and Susie are going on tour, can I go too? 'Cause I have an "s" name, too, and I can sing, too, and I'm er, ... um..., 21, too! ***cough*** What shall we call our band?

FYI-

I, like everyone else, am a little dismayed about Deb's last post, but to be honest (and Deb might get mad at me for letting you all know) I think Deb is more heart broken then anything else right now.

You would have thought that having Leukemia, losing the ability to live with your daughter and every other aspect of your life was bad enough, but... as anyone knows... having to deal with with a broken heart is one the hardest things one can do.

As much as I would love to give the details (and cuss out the perpetrator)... I won't ('cause that's Deb's business, not my own.) But I did want to let you all (all the Debuma Fan Club) to know, kind of what was going on. And I think that if anyone has ever felt what it was like to have someone open up their chest and rip out their heart, then you might understand what Deb is feeling right now.

Thanks for loving my sister so much. Deb will post as soon as a) she's hooked up to the internet and b) she's feeling up to it. She might be a little gun shy as the person who hurt her was someone she met through her blog.

Take care and say prayers,

Blogging can be such an emotional strain, especially when so many people are watching. I've seen it time and time again in the years I've been online.

I'm here for you an time you need me, just give me a call. Meanwhile, take care of yourself and know you are surrounded by a lot of love.

(Also, should you decide you want to password protect your site or something like that, let me know. I can handle the technical side of it all.)

A big thanks to Sis# 2 for the update and please pass along to Deb that we will be here when she is ready. No one deserves to have there heart ripped out and stepped on. it can takes a long while to feel alive again.
Peace to her and her family
nancy

The Yiddish Yoda Master aka Shoshie or Shoshanna
(say that 10 x really fast) has this to say.

1. Deb we love you
2. Your family is wonderful
3. Sis #2 thanks for your post. Thanks for all
you do for Deb. As they say "no man is an
island". You get a bajillion gold stars
for everything you do. Along with Sis #1 and
Sis #3.
4. "The Real Mom" it doesn't matter how old you
are you always wish for or want your Mom.
3 cheers for Mom coming to take care of Deb.

I can only speak for myself. Families who
step up to the plate like y'all did (did I do
that y'all right?)are the bestest.

I think I can say this about most of the
DEBUMA FAN CLUB. It sucks that her heart
was broken. But we will be here for Deb when
and if she is ready to greet her loyal subjects.

I wouldn't leave this site for all the tea
in China. From what I understand that's a whole
lot of tea.

PLUS I have an assignment-teach the Queen some
Yiddish.

Love
Shoshie

I am also going to be in a band with Susie
and Eclectic. When we tour Houston this summer
all of Deb's family can sing with us.

The tickets will be 1.00 we are so good.

"I didn't mean to disappoint everyone, but I just do."

With apologies to Mandy Patakin and William Goldman...

Disappoint...you keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

The word you need to use is "inspire". Substitute that in your sentence and it makes much more sense.

"I didn't mean to inspire everyone, but I just do."

Yes, that's much better.

But I understand how taxing this blog must be and if this is in any way an impediment to your fight, then out it must go. Know, dear Deb, that you are always on our minds. You keep fighting, we'll keep praying for your health and strength.

God bless you, Deb.

Thanks so much for giving us the update, Sis#2. I'm just a lurker, but I've been reading since last summer, so I wanted to put my 2 Cents in and say that We Love You, Deb, and just want you to be healthy, happy and back with Zoe. You're in our prayers.

Thanks Sis #2 for the update. Deb - I know what you are feeling - its a hurt like no other and you feel like you will never feel whole again . .. but you will sweetie . . . with time. . . take whatever time you need and get better physically and emotionally. Maybe you might want to close this blog and open another password protected one for all of us that love and truly care for you.
Oh listen to me - being all bossy! Sorry about that.
Just know that many of us are thinking of you and praying for you and would do anything to help make you feel better.
Big hugs

Last night while Cody & I were doing his spelling homework and I was feverishly looking for the word "gonyaulax"* (5th grade advanced spelling group..yeesh, where do they find these words?), I came across a great Yiddish word - gonif. The word for thief. Which brought to mind our Queen Deb as the Queen's joy has been stolen just when it was being polished and prepped to share the light of day.

So Shoshie and Queen Deb, you've gotten me more interested in my Yiddish lessons (my great grandmother was, as my mom says, a Jewess).

The things we learn on the internet... I tell ya, they are amazing. We find others and we find ourselves in so many ways. Big 'ol Mom/Sis/Friend-hugs to each of you.

* gonyaulax = n. a large genus of phosphorescent marine dinoglagellates that when unusually abundant cause red tide

I'm a lurker also. But I certainly can relate to a broken heart. Deb, please be strong and do what you have to do for YOU and ZOE!! You are worth it and your broken heart will mend. Look what you've already overcome!! Get better and then come back, we'll all be waiting.

Debuma,
I can only partially grasp how you must be
feeling. Love and betrayal of your love is
inconcievable to me. You own this blog, and it
is your right to do what you see fit to do.
As always I wish I could write you an Rx for
a broken heart. But the only Rx for a broken
heart is to grieve for the loss. Hold on tight
to those who love you for you.
I won't state on your blog what I think about
the human who betrayed you. It is not my place
to offer my opinion.
I hope you know the impact you have had
on all of the SWLF crew. I think about you all
the time. You represent the best in humans,
loving, caring, courgage, fun, intelligent and
I could go on and on. We have a saying "the SWLF
family" Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. I love you Deb for what that is worth.

Nikki

just checking in, cause i do that. a lot. just in case. and thanks to sis #2 for posting the mini-update. xo to you, deb. xo

You can do this for you Deb. As my sisters have
said we will wait for you.

Kisses,
Lisabeth

I'm still here and not a goin' anywhere!

Hey, that rhymed and I didnt plan it. WooHoo!

I'm going with Shooshie, Susie and Eclectic, we're gonna come to TX, and sing to you until you're all well.

Love you Deb. Always. No matter what you're feeling, you are loved by so many. Dont ever forget that.

Don't Quit

Source Unknown

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit -
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don't give up though the pace seems slow -
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man;
Often the struggler has given up
When he might have captured the victor's cup;
And he learned too late
when the night came down
How close he was to the golden crown.
Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar,
So stick to the light when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit.

Love you, Deb. Take care, my friend, but please don't give up.

Yo Debufans,

Deb just called from the hospital and asked that I'd let you guys what was going on. Though Deb might be the Queen of the Universe and the subset of Delft, unfortunately, her rule apparently does does not include the fiefdom of Time Warner Cable. They were supposed to show up between 10-12 today to install her cable and internets and they disrespected her royal being by blowing off the installation and not even calling to say that they postponed the @#$%&*! appointment. (TWC should feel damn lucky that I can't smote people).

Anyhow, long story long, Deb can't post right now because 1. she's spends most days at the hospital and 2. she don't have no stinkin internets. Allegedly, it will be installed tomorrow between the hours of 8 am to 8 pm. Yeah right, (insert profanity here).

She did want me to let you guys know how she is doing:

She is still within the timeframe where some BMT patients still are in the hospital. She is really weak right now, her stomach stuff is doubleplus nongood feeling and acting, and she would give a bizilliondy bucks if she had it to get some real sleep. When she is able to sleep she is having some very bizarro wakeful dreams that make her feel unrested.

We've been telling her about the posts here and the good wishes and they mean a lot to her during this time. She is feeling low and in pain and just so. damn. tired. She will post when the fiefdom makes it something she can do again, and only as much as she feels able to.

And I want to thank y'all too--anything that helps make Deb feel better makes me feel better too. :)

Deb,
Great to hear you're back home, thats SUCH a good sign.
Love to Zoe and yourself, and hope to hear more good news soon.
Love ya

Thanks for the update. I have been wondering about how she is doing. I miss her posts and updates. Tell her she is still on our minds and in our prayers. Even tho I don't know your sis, I do hope with all my might she kicks this thing soon. I have a sister too and this would be one of the hardest things I can imagine to go thru.

Much love and heartfelt wishes for restored health,
Kathy

Sis # 1,

Thanks for the update, the nerve of TMC messing
with the Queen. Tell the Queen we will entertain
ourselves while she concentrates on getting better.
When and if she decides to post, we will be here.

We will sing to her (I am a great singer, andgoing
on tour with a few other bloggers) leave her jokes, and other fun stuff. We will all play nice in the sand box.

Love,
Shoshie

So glad to see the update Sis #1. Thank you! I do hope you're feeling less hurt Deb. You are in my thoughts most of the day.

Love,
Dawn

The NERVE of them at TWC! Oh, yeah, I have them, and am constantly pissed at them....

Deb, you can do this! You are tough and strong. Take your time and take care of you.

Laurel

Thanks for the updates - it is such a community here - all this positive energy going Deb's way. I have been checking in daily and the comment section is a entry in itself. Love(of friends and supporters) is a many splendid thing (and no, I can't sing just ask my cat who just ran away squealing)I'll leave the singing to the Queens Revellers (do you guys have a name??)Love from Melbourne, Yasmin

P.S I really didn't know cats could squeal!

The Queen's Revellers!! Brilliant!

Debuma, my queen, I am willing to travel to Houston and do battle with TWC on your behalf. I have a sword, and I'm not afraid to use it.

Meanwhile, I hope your tummy feels better soon and you get a full night's rest.

~The Duchess

oh, fie upon TWC!! thanks for the update sis #1. :) i hope deb starts to feel a little better soon. i'm thinking of you, deb.

eclectic, the band's name, as always, is Nikki and the Sisters. Of course you can come. You too, Peaches. You have a great name to be in a girl band.

Deb, among the many services offered by loyal blogfriends is that of "posse," that is, professional asskickers. So, if you need us to, certain singers/dancers/all-'round entertainers can convert to an ass-kicking posse at a moment's notice. I'm just saying . . .

And Nikki might "throttle me" me for this, but her alter ego is a real BADASS, just in case you ever need the services of such a person.

Now, let's sing something nice . . .

I think Susie has me confused with someone else.
I am not a BADASS. Susie say's that because I
believe in being an advocate for the patient.
I was barking orders at her when she was having
a medical "situataion".

We need a better name for this band. Nikki and
the Sister's is not that great. Susie, Shoshie,
Dawn and Eclectic better come up with a better
name.

I hope the Queen had a better day, stomach aches
are not fun. Stomach aches which cause you pain
are the pits. Let's all raise our glasses of
Gatorade and toast the Queen. "Long live the
Queen".

Love,
Nikki

Posted something for you at my place. I hope you don't mind.

Rest up.

Oh Oh Oh!!!

THE COW LICKERS!!!!

What a great band name! Come on now, you all know you like it.

I will NOT lick a cow.

Nikki is a BADASS! Nikki is a BADASS!

Oh come on now Susie! Why not? Everyone is doin' it. ;-)

Like everyone else, I'm checking deb's blog daily and its great to read all the comments! Everyone's comments are so beautiful and thoughtful and what Yasmin wrote is so true, it certainly does feel like a community is forming. Lotsa luv from Australia xoxox
P.S Attention to Yasmin........wherabouts in melbourne do you live? I Live in Warrnambool!!

Thanks for the update Sis #1. Sisters are the best.

thanks for the update!

these comments are a riot! hahaha-i can't wait for the tour!

xoxoxo

i hope the cable guy shows up soon!!

Good Morning! I hope you are seeing things from a different angle this morning. Sometimes, we just need to be sad, cry, whatever it is that you needed when you wrote this post. Its ok. IT IS OK.

We love you more for it. You are the Queen.
Now, I even have a lovely picture of you to show the boys, and put on our fridge. With all you're going through, you still send out thank you cards. I'm giggling at that. When I opened it, I cried.

Love to you my Queen.

Still thinking about you, darlin. Hugs to you.

Good Morning Queen,

Guess what we have class today. The Yiddish
phrase of the day is bei mir bist du shayn.

Now you know the drill I put this in a sentence
for you. Deb to me you are still beautiful.

Thats what that means in English-you are still
or always will be beautiful.

And Susie oh man are you going to be in big
"TWOUBLE". Telling Nikki she is a BADASS.
Bwahahahahahaha.

Cow licker for the band name-HELLO I don't think
so. I love you Dawn but no way am I singing in
a band called the cow lickers. NOPE AINT GOING
TO HAPPEN.

Tell the TWC folks they are fercockt-and WE ALL
know what that word means.

XOXOX
Shoshie
The Yiddish Yoda Master
Future Rock Star
Headed for the NUT HOUSE.

Deb -- You have no duty to anyone but yourself (and by extension Zoe). I obviousoly don't know you, but it sounds like some personal-life upheaval plus that little cancer thing have creamed you. As a veteran of the depression wars, might I recommend medication? Prozac works best for me, but there are lots of others -- ask your doc if they would interfere with your othre meds. Talk therapy is also helpful but not nearly as fast-acting expecially when you brain chemistry is just plain fucked up through no fault of your own. Anyway, I'll keep checking your site every day in hopes of seeing you back soon. Best of luck!

Thanks Sis #1 for the update. So sorry to hear Debuma is feeling crappy. I'm praying that the bad days are coming to an end soon - physically and emotionally. Take care of yourself Deb and know that we all truly care.

I kinda LIKED The Queen's Revellers. **sigh** Dawn, I'm afraid Cow Lickers is... um... too bovine.

What I really want to know is, will Susie sing "Don'tcha", because there's a song just aching for a remake.

*heh* (There's an earworm for ya -- no charge)

Debufans-

Thanks to some kindness of a gallant knight of the Debu realm, reports are that all of her cable stuff was hooked up this morning, right before her doc appointments. So I guess Debu really is Queen of the ENTIRE Universe, including TWC.

Deb is having a long, involved day at the hospital today so some special goodly thoughts and prayers would be mightily appreciated. Don't know if she will feel up to posting later, but you never know.

BTW, y'all are whack, but in the good way. :)

Deb

You are still my ass kicking hero, regardless. you are in my thoughts and prayers and I love you lots.

We in NYC are here for you and always will be.

Hugs,
Michelle

Eclectic, we can do Dontcha! You know, if we're gonna do Pussycat Dolls songs . . . I have some serious work to do on my wardrobe . . .

There's a movie out now about the Cable Guy. I hope it wasn't THAT cable guy who um, "hooked you up" Deb, if you know what I'm sayin' . . . Don't do crack, Deb.

Geesh! Everyone is against cow lickin'!! Too bovine! Cracking me up Eclectic!

No way am I dressing like the pussycat dolls. I dont even come close to that body type. Even if I did, all you'd see is stretch marks!

Cow lickers is out. Sigh.

Oh!! How about:

The Queens Posse?
Deb's Dream Team?
Princesses of the Universe?

Peaches, stretch marks are IN. Don't you know this? Especially if they spell something. Or sort of look like a famous person's profile. Check yours. I just KNOW you're IN.

okay, so i'll take back the fie upon TWC. obviously i should have had more faith in deb's reign over the entire universe!

i love me those SWLF sisters. we all need a crew of them as a cheering section.

susie, if anyone finds a religious icon in their stretch marks would it be best to keep it under wraps (so to speak)?

Don't you tease us, moxiemomma. If you are in possession of such a . . . feature, the first step is to post a picture of it on your blog :)

Then, there must be a way to make money from it on Ebay. Or, you could tour with the band, and we could have a little sideshow. So, no, honey, the last thing you'd wanna do is keep that underwraps . . .

Yeah! And we'll entitle it the "Madonna-Mark Tour", unless the stretch mark looks like the Budha or something. Then, we're screwed.

They are not Budha lookin', just road map looking. Perfect for a road tour!

kisses to you, deb. even my good-for-nothing ex-husband was up in arms that someone (anyone!) would be mean to you. and that says something. tho i'm not sure what. thanks to the sis's for the updates, and hoping the tummy calms down. xo

((((DEB))))
You've let no one down (INCLUDING YOURSELF!). Opening your heart is not a character flaw. Being a big stupid meanie is. I hope the break from your blog does you some good and selfishly I hope it's short-lived. I miss your wit and candor already. You remain in my thoughts and prayers for healing of body and heart.

{{HUGS}} Do what is best for you!

I want you back on line. You have been an inspiring part of my blog day. I have been encouraged by your fighting spirit. When it was time for my yearly cancer check ups, you were there fighting for yourself and your little one and I drew strength from you. You have shared so much with all of us and we have grown to love and care about you. Wonderfully human heros like you are hard to find. Perhaps it is selfish not to want you to go out of my cyber life, but we need each other. All of us, so I will close with the same words that started this comment. I want you back on line.

My prayers and thoughts continue to be with you.

HOLY DRECK (crap in Yiddish)

Y'all need to get a grip on this band name. We
can do better. We could call it the FAB FERCOKTS
No cow licking names, no Madonna anything....

Now DEBUMA...you are the offical tour promoter
for this group. So when and if you read this
you have to handle the bajillion bookings we
will get. I think SIS #1 and you should join
this tour. We saw SIS #1's move when she did
the Texas Fan thing. She can move and groove.

I hope the Queen is feeling better. Those long
day's at the RITZ SUCK. I hope your tummy is
better.

Sis #1 very good observation that many of
us are goof balls. My eldest sis thinks we
her real sisters should start running Zoloft
in our drinking water. She could be right :)

We had a big old dinner tonight Deb for Nikki.
My kids all cried...OY VEY..It was pretty sad,
but we did have some good laughs.

Good-night QUEEN
Love,
Shoshie