debutaunt.com

oh, honey, i'm so sorry about today. and that antisocial ipod face? completely intimidating. i wouldn't even THINK about talking to you if i saw you out somewhere. and that makes me wonder . . . how did we ever block people out before we had ipods?

I never had to do the dookie shake but just your explanation of it made me a little queasy. I can't believe you could hold it down. You need to apply at Fear Factor!!

I had orange sherbert today. Low fat, tastes good. And it was one of those push-ups like you used to buy in the school cafeteria. It was good.

No stories here. Nuh huh. Wouldn't even try it tonight. :) Cody has that face too sometimes and it even works really well even without an iPod for him. Of course, he usually just reserves it for me.

You are the Queen of Control, I swear. I thought I was good at un-horking but you've got my respect. I hope they figure out what you need to stop your rollercoaster ride because I'd hate to have you be the fearless iPod girl with the cute undies who horked on the cute tech's machine. :)

Deb, you remain ever the wind beneath my wings. Some days just suck, and the best we can ever do with them is get to the end of them and allow a new day to start. And you do it with grace and aplomb. (Not sure exactly what a plomb is, but I'm sure you got one somewhere in there.)

I am sitting up tonight due to a plumbing emergency at 1am waiting to hear from a plumber and thought I would check in on you. And here you are still putting one foot in front of another, remembering to wear cute panties to the hospital, and staying connected with all the people that are travelling this road along side of you.

You inspire me - and i know you probably think that is nuts and you are feeling as least inspirational as possible right now - but see thats it. Anyone can keep going when the road is downhill and the wind is at their back - but to keep taking care of yourself and to keep loving Zoe like you do - well, thanks. :-) I know you made my night a little brighter while i wait for my plumber.

As I was thinking about you and where you are, this poem came into my mind, so i found a copy to paste it to you. I'll do that in a second though cuz I wanted to give you my two bits regarding monkey boy. Shakespeare said "There is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so." So whether the relationship was a good one for you ro not, its your thinking that makes it so. I was concered with the amount of deception involved in the beginning since you seem to be such a straight shooter, and I know from my experience that nothing built upon lies can last.

I do know that for me writing and sharing my story and my troubles with others helps it lose its poer over me and my thoughts. When i keep having the same feelings and thoughts sent and resent into the front of my brain without asking - then I know I need to share it to make it lose its power over me. They say a joy shared is doubled and a trouble shared is halved - writing about it will double the joys you find in the relationship, halve the troubles from it and give you the power over your thoughts. Remember, you only have to worry about what is the right thing for you to do - whether someone meets the consequences of the behavior they chose or reads soething that may bother them is not on your side of the street.

Either way, I got my yellow Uma pennant and noise maker and I am cheering you on from the sidelines. You are doing so much better than you realize. Uma would be proud to know you are still swinging that katana. Even she would have probably hurked (and one thing in the "plus" column for monkeyboy is his getting you that picture).

So you keep going, pretty lady. The hair and eyebrows look good. Here's that poem I mentioned, and I'm gonna call the plumber again. I needed to reread it again for my stuffage too - so you have already helped me again tonight.

Don't Quit

When things go wrong as they sometimes will.
When the road you’re trudging seems all up hill.
When funds are low and the debts are high.
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh.
When care is pressing you down a bit.
Rest, if you must, but don’t you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns.
As everyone of us sometimes learns.
And many a failure turns about.
When he might have won had he stuck it out:
Don’t give up though the pace seems slow –
You may succeed with another blow.
Success is failure turned inside out –
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt
And you never can tell how close you are.
It may be near when it seems so far:
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit –
It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit.

- Author unknown

Deb, I know that was supposed to be your super-antisocial face, but I'm in so in awe at how good your skin looks, and how great your hair is growing in. For what it's worth. :)

I always try to read when I get a chance, and it seems whenever I pick up a book, at the doctor's, or when my wife was going through all her surgeries, or even at work on my breaks, someone thinks I must be bored, and I need to be entertained...

Wish I could do that face!

Hope they figure this all out really soon, sweetheart!

Thinking of you...

alna

I did three things at once while reading this. I prayed for you and send you good energy and I laughed. You're not supposed to be this funny when you're feeling like the shiznit... are you?

mucho hugos.

ps I sent you a package - but the Fed exer guy seemed like he wasn't really gonna send the gifty (since I had to dash before him and his slow poke self could give me a receipt) -- I hope he did. If not, more gifties to come, I promise.
xx
snit

I would work on the "don't talk to me face". Because
you look cute, and not mean and nasty. I would talk
to you.

I agree with Michelle, you should not be this funny
when you feel like shit. I almost horked reading
about the tests. Water and chalk do not sound
like some festive umbrella drink on a beach.

You amaze me, I see sunny skies in your future.

I am a x-ray tech turned mri tech and I have also had an upper GI 3 years ago(but it seem like yesterday after reading your post), You described the barium 100%.
I was embarrassed that I couldn't drink the whole two cups, I threw my second in the trash. I got caught and they knowing I was a tech was quite the bad thing to do, but it SUCKED. I give you so much credit for drinking that shit.....but its the only way to see the gut. I guess we do what we have to do. You are a geat patient but I
hope you feel better real soon and are free from test for a long while.

Ah, Deb - what a crappy day for you. Ugh all around. I know you are hating it all right now and I am sorry.

Through good and bad, you can do this, Deb. Sending electronic hugs and good thoughts.

A terrible day.
A TERRIBLE DAY BEHIND YOU.

Walk on dear Deb...

Deb,

I haven't signed in for awhile but I have been thinking of and praying for you. Sorry for that horrible milkshake day at clinic. Bleh. I agree, you are too funny for someone being put through that. I love the ipod face. Nice touch. You know sooner or later, someone will still come up to you and just start droning on despite the face and the ipod. I hope they are able to figure out what's making you so nauseated and miserable. I want to hear about you enjoying some yummy healthy foods (and maybe some sinful ones too) and feeling good.

Kris

Oh Deb I am so sorry for your crappy day yesterday. I am so proud that you made it through and kept on chuggin that crap.
I love the pic - you are very beautiful, even with your antisocial listening to my Ipod look. LOL
Prayers for a better day today and that you are feeling GOOD very soon.
Hugs

I read your blog daily, but rarely comment. I felt compelled to tell you today that you are a strong lady, and you will make it.

I used to be the tech that gave those icky tests, and I've always told myself I will never get one. They're awful. That's why they never tell you up front what it's going to be like.

Anyway, I feel for you and I've been sending prayers your way for a few months now.

In the event they find nothing, I hope this will help. A while ago, I got a double whammy of typhoid and hepatitis. They're so much better TOGETHER! :) Anyway, after I recovered, I had no appetite. I was nauseaus (oh, howEVER you spell that) constantly. I felt "full" constantly. I didn't loose weight for a while, but then lost 20lb in what seemed like a couple weeks. I ate like one meal a day and that was a very small meal. I just didn't want to eat, and besides, I was always nausea. I'm not spelling that again! I considered going to the doc, but once the weight started coming off, it was kinda nice. Just yesterday I was hungry. I ate almost all day long. :) Today I'm hungry again. I don't know if this was a weird side-effect of typhoid+hep or what, but I had 2 months of no appetite and now I'm eating. So maybe that will happen to you! :)

thinking of you deb. and also thinking that you may ~feel~ like shiznit, but you're looking lovely. your eyes are so pretty, and now that the brows, etc., have grown back in they are even prettier.
xo

That was some day girl. Congrats on not horking or barfing, surely God kept you from it.
And your right, if i see someone with those things in there ears, that means they don't wanna talk, good plan.
I hope you get good results from your tests and you won't have to have anymore.
Hugs
Kathy

WOW... what a day:-(

Fabulous antisocial i-pod face... scary stuff!

Mission: 1 milkshake - Check

deb, i'm sorry you had to go through all of that yuck! keep on.

(your scary face is too cute to be scary)

xomox

What a completely horrible sucky day for you!!!!
But I must say you are a better woman than me!! I couldn't have controlled myself; I would have HONKED all over everywhere!! Until reading this, I have NEVER talked with any patient in my carrer that could actually drink that stuff, let alone finish it. KUDDOS to you girl!!!! I cant help but love the face; I would have left you alone and I must say your eyebrows and hair are beautiful!!
Hang in there girl!!!!
Cami

Debu ~

Your strength of spirit and detirmination to get well is breath taking...........

Continue to be patient and continue to fight as you have.........it will happen, sweet little brave girl .......

I'd stay far away if I saw that face! I hope you feel better soon honey.

Delurking for a second to say that drinking radioactive milkshakes combined with that pic of your antisocial face makes me think one thing -"Bouncer". Stay tough.

Ooooh, that does not sound like fun. I like your "leave me the hell alone" face, though.

((((HUGS))))

Aloha Deb,

That's a good face. I am going to practice that one.

I do hope you're in a better mood today.

Yesterday one of my girls turned me on to a new comedian. You probably alredy know him. Dane Cook. Very funny stuff. Oh Ya!

Keep kickin butt my dear. You are going to persevere. How I know this? I just do.

Love to you & Zoekins.
EV

I can see all that sucks. I've had the pukey milkshake -- but never pop rocks. Ewwwww.

You have the strength of an uber woman.

You go.

And super yay for cute panties.

Sherry

Well, nice as your skin looks and how great those eyebrows are, I definitely get the message from that face. And I didn't notice it before, but I think Zoe has your (beautiful) eyes.