May 22, 2007
I put the fun in funky
It's been so weird to me to not blog every day.
I've been volunteering with the Leukemia Society and then did the bone marrow drive at our church on Sunday. We signed up six people. And while I should be happy to sign up those six, I'm actually a little bit insulted about the apathy I encountered. There are nearly 5,000 people that go to our church. 5,000. People looked at me like I was a Hari Krishna when I was handing out flyers after church. They couldn't wait to get out of there. At my church in Houston, we used to have events in the gym after mass and people lingered and talked to one another. Not so much here.
I know part of it is fear of pain. (Thanks Grey's Anatomy - you buttholes, it's not as bad as you just showed it on tv) Part is misinformation (thanks stem cell research controversy). But part is just the way people are. Throw money at something, but don't roll up your sleeves and really get involved. And like I said, I understand.
It doesn't hit you unless it hits close to home. When you have someone diagnosed with a chronic illness, you look at people and think... well you can donate blood, why don't you? You freak out with anger because there is nothing you can do for that person except to surround them with support and help in anyway you can, e.g. giving blood or platelets.
I can't stand to hear that someone can donate blood, but doesn't. But I've been there. I never really was too sure if I could donate or not as I was on insulin before and my diabetes wasn't in great control for a long time. And the one time I signed up to donate, I didn't because I was so exhausted. I think the only reason I was so lucky about the blood karma was that both my parents donated gallons. And when I got sick, my siblings and their spouses had blood drives and they all donated blood.
So, I've been trying not to take it personally, but it does feel personal. These people have so much power to make a difference, and they have no idea.
I've been getting ready for my trip to New Orleans with my sister. We drive to Houston on Thursday and will fly out on Saturday. I'm really nervous about traveling as a patient, but when I'm with Sis #1, everything is just cool. She's made reservations at some cool places for dinner. I'm just looking forward to the weekend.
School is nearly over. And while I always miss Zoe so much when she is gone for the summer, I am looking forward to some free time. I'm planning on traveling to Austin an Houston. Just chilling out. Seeing friends and taking care of myself and my health. I've been watching a Biggest Loser marathon and it's made me want to get back to my gym. I'm ready now. And I always feel like that when I'm around my siblings.
Anyway, time to get the kiddo to bed soon. She's been awesome lately. Still raising money and talking about Team Zoe (although she hasn't gotten any money in about a month). We had Go Spurs Go day at school, so she got to have a free dress day. It was kind of fun.
I can do this. I'm going to be wearing Mardi Gras beads soon.
Your assignment today is to say Happy Birthday to my Aunt "Jucie" Joyce (Momo's sister) who will be 60 soon.
I love you internets. And Amanda, you are right. It never gets any easier. Thanks to those who have emailed me. We are all still missing Brenda. So many loved ones. Your loved ones are mine too.
Posted by debutaunt at May 22, 2007 07:12 PMHappy Birthday, Aunt J! You have a GREAT family from what I've been priviledged to get a cyberglimpse of!
I know a little of your frustration with the motivating people to do something, Deb. Sometimes I feel ineffectual and like I'm never going to see the day when my efforts move someone to actually DO something toward helping the people I love who are in the fight!
I miss Brenda, too, even though I didn't 'know' her. I hate it that there's one less fabulous woman in the world to share their awesomeness with those who know them (and those who don't).
Posted by: Bren/Cody'sMom at May 22, 2007 09:57 PMWatch out New Orleans-you and Sis # 1 will have too much fun.
I am sorry more people did not sign up-but at least 6 folks know the meaning of making a difference.
Happy Birthday "Auntie".
Posted by: Claire at May 23, 2007 06:15 AMGood thing I've been AWOL lately. Instead of feeling slack, I can contribute to Team Zoe NOW and save her from being donation-less for any longer!
(grin)
Whew! I feel better already.
Posted by: salcam at May 23, 2007 08:58 AMOh Deb, I forgot to add to my earlier comment that there might still be a wonderful shop or two that you might enjoy checking out while in New Orleans. It's called The Brass Lion and the jewelry there is wonderful! I got a pair of art deco 'lady with long hair' earrings in pewter or silver. They had music boxes that were amazing in this shop, too.
There's a historical house on State Street that has jewelry in its shop, too. I bought a pewter brooch (sp?) of an art deco cameo there that looks nice with my earrings mentioned above. Since I'm a thrifty person, I know the items were in a reasonable price range and I've had literally hundreds of compliments especially on the earrings.
Also, the Long Vue House and Gardens was a great treat since the greenery here in NM is not as plush and prolific as it is in the south. www.longuevue.com/ for a peek, if you're interested. I bought a small bowl made of white ceramic there that I've enjoyed a great deal, too. If I recall, they also had some neat things for kiddos there, too.
Enjoy your trip - sounds like a great time & great company with Sis #1!
Posted by: Bren/Cody'sMom at May 23, 2007 09:32 AMHappy, Happy Birthday Deb's Aunt Joyce!
And I know how frustrating it can be to get people to step up. My cousin is in MD Anderson in her 4th of 6 or 7 rounds of chemo. I've tried to get people to donate platlets or blood for her or the numerous others who could use it. I got about 5 people to go. I'm going again in 2 weeks so I'll talk it up around the office. We'll see, maybe this time I'll have better news to report. Wish me luck.
Blog when you can but don't be burdened by it. Just let us know you're still doing well and we can let you know that you remain, as always, in our prayers.
Posted by: Patrick at May 23, 2007 09:45 AMIt makes me mad too that more people don't donate blood. I think part of the problem is that most people just don't think about it. I've been doing it for years because I'm O negative. Then on the other hand maybe more people don't donate because of a past bad experience.
That's what happend to me recently. I went to the blood and tissue center here in SA for a routine platelets donation(which is when I met you). Everything went off without a hitch. My goal was to donate platelets at least once a month. Then after meeting you I uped the ante and told myself to donate platelets every 2 weeeks. So I was back on May 17 ready to go. The nurse attending to me struck an artery on the way in with the needle which made my blood bubble up. The vein was rendered useless. i told her to try my left arm. Would you believe she messed up again and I was sent home without being able to give a single donation? And to make matters worse, because she collasped my veins, I am unable to go for 8 weeks!! That really ticks me off!! The evidence of just how bad of job she did has been apparent since that day. Black and blue, and yellow, I look like an IV drug user!
I'll still be back in eight weeks. Also because of you I'm am now on the bone marrow donation list. You are here for a reason.
Love ya,
Carla
i hope you are doing well. i miss brenda terribly.
Posted by: miah at May 26, 2007 09:38 PMHi. I'm new to your blog, having found it through CancerDiva (Terry Hays). I have stayed up 'till 4:30 AM a couple of nights reading the complete archives. How amazing to have your life chronicled such.
I haven't been through what you've been through. I am, as I tell some, a Chemo Babe, but it's for autoimmune disease, not cancer. While I get the 104 degree fevers and am hospitalized about twice a year, I have never had a BMT.
I have really enjoyed reading your blog. It's up and it's down. It's funny and it's true. I think you look great (though I've also been both 200 lb and 88 lb in the course of my disease and I've had moon face too many times to count). I don't know why Chef, MonkeyBoy, and Elvis acted like turds. But there are other men out there.
And someday, you'll have your hair and your dignity back. I've been through some of this, though it seems like I got the sampler platter of misery while you get the all you can eat buffet every day. I am also on SSDI and have a five-year-old daughter who keeps me going.
I just had a blood drive for my church. 4 double cell units and 9 whole blood were collected. Not as good as last time, but we still saved some lives. I can't donate and that's why I organize the drives.
So when is the Debutaunt kick-ass celebration? I would love to come to your birthday party!
RachelY in Houston
Posted by: RachelY at May 30, 2007 12:43 AM