debutaunt.com

I'm a Sicko

Thank you Michael Moore for making me cry.

Missing Zoe. Missing her so much. And these next two days will be just agonizingly slow. She flies home Tuesday with her father's girlfriend. The the girlfriend hops right back on another plane and will hopefully get to fly home. Or catch a later flight. Hope not the later one because it's a 2 hour drive to their hometown from the airport. She's sweet to bring Zoester home to me.

I know I have to leave Houston soon and I don't want to go. My sisters are here. My friends are here. Zoe's little friends are here and her wonderful cousins. We love them so much; I swear they are like my own children. I adore them. I love my folks, but I don't really know anyone in San Antonio. And the ones I do know, don't really know me and think I'm some sort of cancer girl freak. I feel like a total freakshow there.

But mom and dad are in San Antonio. And they have a big house. And I feel safe with them. And they take care of me when I need it. Zoe's school is there too. I don't want to pull her into a new school again. I hope she does better in 2nd grade than she did in first. She was so restless and anxious.

I'm too confused about my life, but when I think about it, it makes me cry. For someone who isn't alone, I feel really lonely. I'm going to go bury my head in the sand a bit.

I can do this. But some days I feel like I can't.

Another no assignment day. Not really up for thinking much. I'm just going to go to bed. Hugs to my family.

Posted by debutaunt at July 29, 2007 10:45 PM