Zoe on the Go-ey

She's having a blast with her dad. I'm in Zoe withdrawal. She loves tennis camp. Two hours a day.

"Did you have fun at tennis camp?"

"Yes, it's a blast."

"Are you any good?"

"No. I stink. It's not as easy as it is on the wii."

Such is life.

I am enjoying Austin. It suits me. I may get to meet my girl Dawn and her beautiful new baby Gage. I'm headed to Houston for the weekend to babysit for Sis #1. I don't feel much like driving, but I know once I get there I will have a great time. I love my Houston babies.

Man, I miss Zoe. She's exhausting but lovely. I am in serious lack of hugs I think. I remember years ago, after Zoe's dad and I split, I was riding in the car with Sis #2 and her then 3 year old son (I think he was about 3). And I was sad. I can't remember why... probably Zoe's dad. But her son said to me, "Cheew up, Aunt Debby."

That's all it takes for me. A cute little face to make it all right. A drawing from my early-genius fascinating nephew. The sound of my little neice's voice doing an early morning play-by-play. The sight of my littliest niece aka "Busy" walking around - stopping to be curious, moving on to the next thing, pausing, gibberish ... the constant movement. I have a hard time understanding her sometimes, but then out pops a word you know clear as day. It's adorable. Sis #2's kids all look like Disney babies.

I had lunch with Bro #1 (my donor) and his 6 year old daughter and 14 year old step-daughter. The little one is so shy.. hiding behind long blonde bangs. She is so quiet to me and then out pops a complete conversation. Like she is in her own little dreamworld ... sleeping until she wakes. The older one I have known since the day she was born. Her mom and I were good friends before she married my brother. Her daughter is very special to me and I adore her because she's sooo not a bratty teen girl. Awkward sometimes, but so lovely. When everyone says our youth are so lackluster, I think of her and I smile because I know that past that teen angst is a quality human being. I miss seeing her mom. We don't see each other that often.

It's the little things, especially the little ones, that make my life worthwhile sometimes.

I'm tapering off the Lexipro (with the ok from my docs). I know I don't need anti-depressants. I know they help many many people have a better life, but I don't want to be numb to my life. I want to be sad sometimes. I want to grieve if I need to. I've gone through something sad in my life. But I find that these antidepressants make me kind of blah about everything. No highs or lows. Just mid-levels.

I don't mind being sad once in a while. Because I know how resilient I am. I know that it is only a temporary for me. The tapering is making me cry way too much though. I'm getting nosebleeds. I should just shove a box of kleenex up a nostril.

Ok. I want to watch more episodes of 24 on DVD. It's kind of a cool show.

I can do this. I have the little peoples.

Your assignment today is to tell me something small that makes you happy. And if you can't think of anything, find something!

Says Who?

Link: The How Mature Are You Test written by veryblueapple02 on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

P.S.

BTW, I'm not saying not to continue with embryonic stem cell research. I just wish we could put as much effort into making people more aware of adult stem cell research. And the bone marrow donor list. The cure rates would probably go up if we had more people (and cord blood donations) on the list and if they had more funding to more quickly advance the research they already know works and even perfect it. e.g. gvhd issues for transplant patients. Or expanding their research on paralysis or Parkinson's.

I can't get in the middle of the hot topic embryo / fetus issue because I can see both sides of the picture there. Sometimes it's just not worth wasting your breath on an issue with such passionate sides. But when you have something that is working, why not subsidize that more and continue making progress there? Embryonic research is the big push button. Can't we emphasize my beloved adult stem cell research more?

Why put our money on research that is in babysteps when we have some legitimate and viable solutions with more discoveries every day? Sure. Keep on doing embryonic research. That's ok. It is kind of laughable to me because so far the research there has been fruitless. But don't push for the majority of funding into something that is so iffy. That's what I'm saying. Why put all your focus and effort and manhours on embryonic when Adult Stem Cell research is making real progress?

When I was trying to get people to sign up for the Thanks Mom Marrow Donor Drive registry, I called and emailed my pal Lance Armstrong's Foundation. They would not publicize it, email about it, nor would they post it on their site. I was told that they would tell the phone banks for people who called in to the foundation. Yeah. That's what people call about (NOT!)

When I tried to get my daughter's Catholic school to put fliers about our drive in the kids school folders (I even offered to do the work) I was told that I could leave them in the lobby of the school for those who were interested. Yeah. We signed up SIX people out of over 5,000. They were all really interested. *rolls eyes here.*

I'm sorry, but when you (e.g. Lance Armstrong) send me a zillion emails at the touch of a key, and testify to congress and preach and make your living talking about beating cancer and survivorship, and yet I never read anything on your site about the advances they make in cancer CURES with adult stem cells, well it just kind of... pisses me off. Same goes for the many cancer informational sites. No info. It's all about breast cancer and what a beast George Bush is (talk about a job I'd never want!)

The time is now. Get over the drama about the stem cell debate. Just take that word out of the equation. Even the National Marrow Donor Program won't even say the word *whispers* stem cells. They use the phrase "blood producing cells" in their literature.

Everyone hates disease. Especially cancer. As Lance says... we have a 9-11 every few days from those who die of cancer. Put some effort behind something that will make a difference. IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE!! Just ask anyone who has survived a stem cell transplant. Like ME. My family. My Zoe. My friends. It has made a difference. At least I hope so.

I hate that I had friends die from cancer this year. I hate it. And I cry sometimes because I wonder if we had more emphasis on this type of research years ago would they have survived? Would it or could it have made a difference in any of their lives? It makes me so angry. And I wonder... if God spared me so that I could open my big mouth about this topic. So that I could change and inform the many people about the possibilities and the cures?

Please don't let me shout alone. I am shouting for Sarah, and Brenda, and Eric, and Clem, and Ashley, and Gayle, and Cookie, and Kadin, and Paula, and Joseph and all the many loved ones we lose every day.

Don't make me have to stage a boxing match with Michael J. Fox, ok?

Baby Stem Cells, Bush and his Beto Powah

I'm sick of this debate. I don't care much for Mr. Bush. But am I mad that he did the whole veto thing on embryonic stem cells? No. I'm actually not.

Many people are pretty much up in arms over his veto. I was reading a forum about this discussion and here is what I have to say.

I'm a Catholic. And not quite as conservative as my parents, but I feel myself drifting in that direction. I could link tons of links, but I won't. Maybe a few because I read about this issue all the time as I wonder why so many people refuse to sign up on the National Bone Marrow Registry.

Especially you all who are up in a buttwad over Bush's veto and the embryonic stem cell research debate. Do you really even understand the debate? Or do you just hate Bush and anything he does?

Are you on the NMDP list? You know, THE LIST THAT CAN AND HAS SAVED MANY LIVES? Not potentially, but really.

What it boils down to for me is that adult stem cells offer hope, not hype. This country's obsession over this debate takes away funding and exposure for REAL cures with ADULT stem cells.

Part of the debate that some people don't know is that there is no ban on embryonic stem cell research. The research’s been going on for a while now. The controversy comes in because some people think a) we are killing fetuses/lives and/or b) we should not have to personally fund all of it - let the bio-tech and private firms fund it since they will largely with big bucks benefit from it if it works.

I’m more of Camp b). Why should we pay for something that is a might be, especially when adult stem cells are proven to be successful? They probably would be even more so if there wasn't such crap going on with the damn embryo debates. Many of the adult stem cell success has even come from other countries because we in the US are so busy humping the potential of embryonic cells.

“No one should think that the stem cell debate forces us to choose between ethics and science,” she added. “We can support both. There is no need to sell our souls in the quest to heal our bodies.”

I don't know exactly how I feel about aborted fetuses, extra embryos being used, etc. etc. And I'm not really about to debate that. Personally I think that's between you and your God of choice, but I can see both sides so it's not an either or for me.

But I am about saving lives NOW with something that works.

Ok. As most of you know, I've actually received stem cells, ADULT ONES, donated to me by my brother, and so far so good. Cured of leukemia. That's right CURED. My transplant nurse at MD Anderson is over 17 years out - yes YEARS from her bone marrow/stem cell transplant. There are some of us out here already, but the numbers are growing by the day.

From this link - Proponents of embryonic stem cell research have created a false impression that these cells have a proven therapeutic use. On Nightline on June 20, for example, Ted Koppel said that while adult stem cells have some uses, embryonic stem cells are "the most successful to date." In fact the embryonic cells have never helped a human patient; any claim that they may someday do so is guesswork. Adult stem cells have proven benefits, and new uses are constantly being found.

Current Clinical Use of Adult Stem Cells to Help Human Patients:
Autoimmune diseases (multiple sclerosis, lupus, juvenile and other rheumatoid arthritis)
Stroke
Immunodeficiencies, including a new treatment for severe combined immune deficiency (when used with gene therapy)
Anemia
Epstein-Barr virus infection
Corneal damage (full vision restored in most patients treated in clinical trials)
Blood and liver diseases
Osteogenesis imperfecta.
Cancer treatment (in combination with chemotherapy and/or radiation):
Brain tumors
Retinoblastoma
Ovarian cancer
Solid tumors
Testicular cancer
Multiple myeloma, leukemias
Breast cancer
Neuroblastoma
Non-Hodgkin's lymphoma
Renal cell carcinoma
Cardiac repair after heart attack (clinical trials announced Spring 2001)
Type I diabetes (not stem cells as such, but pancreatic islet cells from donors)
Cartilage and bone damage.

Some embryonic stem cells have actually been shown to cause tumors as they are very genetically unstable. "’...with embryonic stem cells, a significant number become cancer cells, so the cure could be worse than the disease. And they can be very difficult to grow, while adult stem cells are very easy to grow.’" Also, "...so these cells [adult stem cells] are less likely to form tumors, a tendency in embryonic stem cells that has barred them from use in human trials."

NO embryonic cells have ever been shown to cure any human beings... why? Because they can potentially cause cancer... so they got BANNED from human trials. Got that?

Yes, I know some of these links are from Catholic publications (so obviously they must be fake or skewed - uh, whatever - Catholics aren't the only ones opposed to embryonic research), but they come from articles in publications such as the Washington Post, Scientific American, The Times (London) and from research facilities like: The Scripps Research Institute, New York University School of Medicine, UT at MD Anderson, Cornell University Medical College, the University of Minnesota, the Robert Wood Johnson Medical School in New Jersey, Argonne National Laboratory outside Chicago, New York University, Yale and Johns Hopkins. There are many others that work with adult stem cell research because the breakthroughs are many and the cures have been happening.

“New Studies Show Promise for Ethical Stem Cell Research” Interesting Link

Some of the titles are just cool and exciting to me:

And this link:

SCIENCE NEWS (Scientific American) http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?articleID=E3DA1666-E7F2-99DF-3D596D3DE6D0976A&chanID=sa003
May 31, 2007 Newfound Stem Cells May Lead to Regenerative Therapies for Damaged Muscles. The discovery of versatile stem cells in muscle tissue could help combat the progression of muscular dystrophy.

If nothing, please read these links before you reply to my post. Use your brain and don’t rely on some fake bullshit that these movies stars and politicians blather about, and try to do your own thinking for once on a subject. I love MJ Fox as much as the next gal, but if he put his power, energy, efforts behind adult stem cell research, I bet he might be much more successful in finding a true cure. Faster and more reliably.

Here are some answers to the FAQ about stem cells and why people oppose the research on embryonic stem cells:

Link to - Scientific Experts Agree: Embryonic Stem Cells Are Unnecessary for Medical Progress

HIGHLIGHTS from this link:

“As compared to embryonic stem cells, adult derived stem cells are endowed with additional developmental instructions and may be better suited for therapeutic purposes. According to [Dr. Shahin Rafii of Cornell University Medical College], ‘We are approaching a day when a patient’s own stem cells can be induced to divide and develop into tissue that can replace that which is diseased or destroyed, making overcrowded organ transplant lists and rejection of foreign tissues a thing of the past’.”

***

Of particular note, local favorite of mine:
A team from the University of Texas M.D. Anderson Cancer Center in Houston recently repaired heart muscles in animals by injecting them with stem cells extracted from human blood. It’s the stem-cell equivalent of Columbus reaching America: Not only would cells harvested from one's own body eliminate the risk that they would be rejected, but obtaining them would be a simple, painless proposition.

“‘This work gives us a way to get the cells that's as easy as giving a blood sample,’ says Edward Yeh, M.D., lead author of the study. The real mind boggler is what the stem cells might mean to the 1.2 million Americans who suffer heart attacks each year.”

***

“Umbilical cords discarded after birth may offer a vast new source of repair material for fixing brains damaged by strokes and other ills, free of the ethical concerns surrounding the use of fetal tissue, researchers said Sunday.”

***

Commenting on a study by researchers at New York University, Yale and Johns Hopkins:

“‘There is a cell in the bone marrow that can serve as the stem cell for most, if not all, of the organs in the body,’ says Neil Theise, M.D., Associate Professor of Pathology at NYU School of Medicine... ‘(t)his study provides the strongest evidence yet that the adult body harbors stem cells that are as flexible as embryonic stem cells’.”

***

“A team of Texas and British researchers says it has produced large amounts of embryoniclike stem cells from umbilical cord blood, potentially ending the ethical debate affecting stem-cell research -- the need to kill human embryos. The international researchers said the cells -- called cord-blood-derived-embryoniclike stem cells, or CBEs -- have the ability to turn into any kind of body tissue, like embryonic stem cells do, and can be mass-produced using technology derived from NASA....

“Scientists believe the ability to replicate tissue could lead to the development of ways to replace organs as well as treat life-threatening diseases such as diabetes, Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s, which have been the focus of stem-cell research.”

***

“New surgery which has apparently helped some paraplegics walk could be performed in Dunedin later this year as part of an international trial, a city neurosurgeon says.

“The surgery used stem cells from the patients’ noses to partially repair their spinal cords, Dunedin Hospital neurosurgeon and Professor of Bioethics Grant Gillett said yesterday.”

[didn't know you had stem cells in yer nose, did ya?]

***

“PharmaFrontiers (a Woodlands, Tx firm) has an exclusive contract to develop stem cells that are created from monocyte white blood cells taken from adult blood donations....

“Stem cell treatment for diabetes and heart failure should be commercially available in five to six years, company CEO Dave McWilliams said. ‘The technology actually allows us to change the cells to stem cells and then change them into any type of cell we want,’ he said.’ ...

“There is no one in the United States currently working on any treatment studies using embryonic stem cells, McWilliams said.”

There is more. Much more. But I’ll stop linking. It’s hurting my brain.

So what can you do?

Spread this link around. If you blog, blog about it. Myspacer it. Forum post a link here. I mean if you are going to debate it to death, at least know what the other side is talking about. Otherwise you are just a blowhole. Here is the link to this entry: http://www.debutaunt.com/archives/001168.php#001168

Join the NMDP registry. Don’t be a damn chicken.

Oh, and give blood. I don’t want excuses. If you are not able, or are too chickenshit, make someone else donate for you. Convince them that Jesus or Buddha or Jimmie Hendrix, Radiohead or Jay Z would do it. Or that it is cool. Heck, some people are now donating blood and then drinking afterwards because they can get a better buzz off less alcohol. Not that I’m recommending that or anything, I’m just sayin’. If you can’t do it, get someone else to take your place. It’s never important until it hits your friends or loved ones. Well I can tell you that everyone who receives blood has friends or loved ones that are fighting and praying for them to live. And so many of them need blood.

If you are pregnant, demand that your baby’s umbilical cord blood be stored.

Call your hospital and tell them that they should start the program there if they don't already have it. Only one hospital in San Antonio will collect for the local bank, that's crazy. So talk to your hospital and tell them they should. Or find a hospital that will. You can actually store it for FREE in the National Registry. Yes, you may not get your own if you should unfortunately need them, but heck; there are what in the US? Four million births a year? Thassa lotta stem cells right dere.

Even if you donate it to a private bank, who is to say that they will still be in business 10 or 15 years from now? Or that the cord blood stem cells will actually be viable so many years from now. It's expensive. And potentially not life saving if they went bankrupt or the cells are no good.

Stop spreading rumors and nonsense.

If the cure for AIDS was on the brink - or even had shown results, why reinvent the wheel on a what if? Especially if that ‘what if’ takes away potential funding monies or attention from the AIDS cure. Why aren’t diseases cured already? Well I know conspiracy theories abound, but I think partially because the funding is going out to half-cracked researchers on "maybe" proposals.

Don’t donate money to people who just want you to wear a wristband or slap a magnet on your car.

Help fund real research and those people who fund it. Like the Leukemia Society, MD Anderson, or other hospitals who are doing research on adult stem cells. Yes, my Lance Armstrong wants you to Livestrong with his little yellow rubber bracelet, but the man also donates money to research. I’d like him to pay more attention to adult stem cell research… but our time will come. Soon. I’m pretty sure that when you donate to a reputable organization that you can also earmark it to be used specifically and only for research.

Please help end the debate. With adult stem cells, real advances are being proven and are curing people.

I hope to be one of them. For a long ass time.

I can do this. I am a supporter of adult stem cell research and I approve of this message.

No assignment for today. Just be informed before you flap your gums!

Shrill Collector

How not to make my day:

Call about a medical bill at 8:00am. Although with the killer headache, it feels like 4am.
Tell me I need to pay the $250 to MD Anderson that I still owe from Oct or Nov 2005.

I agree to pay, of course - I'd be happy to; but don't want direct withdrawal from my checking account in case I have an emergency. I'm low on the extra disposable income, ya know, the whole not working thing and all.

She tells me she can set me up on a low bill plan if I have them directly withdraw it from my account.

"Um. No." What part of no do you not understand?

She starts going over my expenses and wants to know how much I get from disability.

"I don't want to tell you," I reply.

"Well I can't qualify you for a plan unless I know your income amount and your expenses. (for $250?? I could see if I owed like $250K, but two fiddy?)

She asks me what was my plan with MD Anderson when I was there.

"UM. NOT DYING!! That was kind of the plan."

Didn't quite think about the out of pocket when they were billing me $137K for a five day chemo stay. Which I did at least 5 times. $40K for the four-day bronchitis. I don't want to know about the MONTH long stay for my transplant or the THREE WEEK stay for encephalitis. Or even the week stay for the bad headaches where I saw every brain specialist they threw at me. Blah, blah, blah. They keep me alive. And I love them.

They have gotten a lot of money from my insurance company. They were also kind enough to write off some of my out of pocket. Please don't harass me for 250 bucks.

"Ok. So what do you get from disability?"

I tell her. Silence.

"Well that's a lot more money than most people take home anyway (I was assuming her). You *should* be able to pay this off."

I start listing expenses. You wanna play that f*cking game?

Car Payment
Car Insurance
Life Insurance
Renter's Insurance
Storage feel (expensive!)
School tuition (thanks Debu_Dad)
2 other hospital bills
Medical insurance for Zoe
Lunch fees for school
Uniforms (last years were $700)
Cobra payment for me
Gas and/or maintenance
Starbucks. Hey. My damn medical insurance really should pay for that as it stops the headaches every day. Cheaper than some drug anyway.

Uh. Food. Clothes for me once in a grand while.

Do you really want me to go on?

"Well do you get child support?" Yes. If you could call it that. I save it in case Zoes needs to see a doc, since her dad doesn't pay her monthly medical insurance. I don't press the issue because he keeps her for a while during the summer. Although right now I think I have about $3.82 in my savings.

Happy now?

Wait, Shrill Collector. I forgot my meds. Yes. I'm in remission. But I still take about 40 pills a day. EVERY day. And even with a copay they are not cheap. I have spent over $900 a month on them several times. That's why I need my financial aid from MDA. $5 copays. It's worth the drive to H-town to save $600 a month on meds.

"So. Can we set up a payment plan?" I ask.

Back to the direct withdrawal crap.

"So, if I mail them a check directly, they won't cash that?"

"No. They would apply it to any current bills. So do the direct withdrawal and the calls will stop. (I don't care about the calls, most of the time I don't answer because I recognize the number) Like I said, you should (she says rudely as shit) be able to afford it."

"The only thing I *should* still be doing is sleeping. And not getting harassed over a $250 bill. I have a snotty cold and can't get rid of this cough I've had now for three weeks. I should be able to do a lot of things. One of them is to hang up on you, bitch"

I'm just not so nice sometimes. I wouldn't have been an ass had she not been so rude with her tone. She just quite didn't get that, yes, while I do receive some income and sometimes it works for me, it's not enough to cover expenses sometimes. If I had to pay rent, I'd never make it at all. If I get sick, it's worse because they make me take more meds. Whatever. It's my situation and I just wasn't feeling like having a judge hang me over $250. Especially a rude one.

I'm a Cancer who had cancer. We are the crabs. Fairly cool until you start jacking with us! Then watch out. I don't have patience for bill collectors. I think that would be the crappiest job on the planet. I'd rather clean up after zoo animals than have to call people who are in kind of difficult situations and tell them to fork up money. I've had some nice ones though who were like.. woah... that's awesome that you are in remission. God bless you and take care.

I'll pay when I can pay. If not, my life insurance will pay it when I die. Happy?

I can do this. Just don't call so early.

Your assignment for today is to do something charitable. You know, the whole pay it forward kind of thing without the kid getting stabbed in the end. I have a friend in SA who works alot. But he decided to take some time to volunteer at the food bank. If you know someone is having a hard time, send them a sweet card. Find something online that you can send to our soldiers. There are many sites that will ship it for free if you make a donation. And if you can't do that, well then just be nice to someone who seems like they are having a bad day. I know I look like a ginourmous goober all the time because I really do smile at strangers. It takes them off-guard. Aside from my occasional debu_bitching, I usually just try to be happy. It honestly feels good and immediately puts you in a good mood.

My Sis #3 and her b/f really appreciated the house cleaning. I plan on keeping it up. That way no one minds if I stay longer than a normal guest. Besides, they have been so good and sweet to me that I just want to help make their lives easier. I love them!

I miss my siblings. I wish we could all take a vaca together with all of them!

Sadness

My friend R in Iraq lost ten men on Father's day. Many wounded too.

Please say some prayers for them and their families.

Say what you will about the war, but soldiers just amaze me. He will forever be my hero. How could you not be in awe of someone like that?

... platoon has earned 12 purple hearts, three bronze stars, arcom with valor five soldiers medals for saving the lives of soldiers

God bless you, R.

Happy Birfday to Sis #3

Still vacationing, but have moved my act to Sis #3's casa. She and her cutie boyfriend are in Vegas and I am housesitting. I'm also a cleaning fool. She took such good care of me before when I was doing the chemo cha-cha, that I figured it would be nice for them to come home to a clean, well-organized home. I'm even taking care of her ginourmous dogs and her rabbit, appropriately named Bunny.

I need to get finished up before they get home, and also because I still have the financial aid paperwork to do. They are going to be all up in my biz. I bet they say I drink too much Starbucks. And they would be right. But since it helps with my headaches, I consider it part of my medication regiment. Maybe I can get my doctor to write a prescription for it.

I feel pretty good, but still have the cough. No fevers or anything else that would lead me to think it's an infection, but it's still bothersome to me. I'm also really damn sore in my hipbones. Lots of moving around and bending, etc, so I wonder if that is it. It's right where I have my bone marrow biopsies. It could be because I'm nearing the big 4-0. I was going to have a birthday party fundraiser, but I have decided that it's a pain to plan my own party. Not to mention too much work and not enough fun. So dinner and a movie it is.

I am missing Zoe like crazy, but am enjoying being alone for a change. I like the solitude and the not having to talk to anyone if I don't want to. I've been eating super healthy and I feel well. Although tonight I have had a hard time sleeping. I bet I sleep the afternoon away.

That's about it. Claire says she misses me. Well I miss you all too. I miss you all a whole damn lot.

Hugs to Claire, The SWLF Sisters, D1, Ctal, Meerkat, Dbanana, Paige, Cali Stephanie, Mrs. H, Linda T, Cody's Mom Bren, Emily G, Patrick P, GJulie (hugs hugs hugs), Dave, Dandees, Allison, Dawn, Dad (Happy Father's Day), Pam C, Robin, Traci, Miah, Sandra, Jake's Meridith, Day (get well soon), Collins, Ms. Pants, Sis #1 and #2 (Guatamala bound), Denise K, Cheryl, Amanda, Lisa, My ATC nurses, and nurse Vicki, Kami and Cami (Happy belated b-day to you!). Not sure who all has stuck around the joint anymore. It's been awfully quiet around here. And I still miss Brenda.

I want a date. I haven't been on a real date in a long long time. It makes me feel like a boy.

I can do this. My hair is insane, but I can do this.

Your assignment for today is to drink a lot of water. It was 91 here in Austin today and I swept the garage of bunny and dog hair all morning. I was wearing a mask and gloves, but damn it was hot. So I chugged a hot tub of water today. Refreshing! Plus it makes my skin look pretty. Which is good when your hair looks like a crazed camel.

Ah, What a Little Vaca Will Do

Fast entry. Sorry, Claire, my love.

On vacation in Austin.

Zoe's dad flew in and stayed overnight in a hotel with her. They flew to NY this afternoon. I had such a hard time saying goodbye. I hugged and hugged her up Tuesday. I miss her already.

I'm going to use this time for some R&R and catching up on paperwork.

This house has a view of a gorgeous lake. I'm here with Sis #1 and her family. Um. Awesome. So so awesome.

I feel better, but still have allergies.

I can do this, but will be making it short. Babysitting tomorrow so I need some "energies"

No assignment today. Enjoy some swimming if you can. I am!

P.S. Convo with Zoe.

"Mom, when we get to Austin, you need to check your bellybutton. Cos sometimes things get stuck in mine, so you probably have some too."

Love you internets!

Bahahahaha... I needed this today

Thanks to my friend Collins. She's the coolest!

WOMAN'S POEM

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.

I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to 'how big is my behind?'
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.

MAN'S POEM

I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge
boobs who owns a liquor store
and a golf course.
This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a sh*t.

Be Cool Today

My friend R (very cool dude) in Iraq phoned me the other day. He says it's about 120 degrees there now (outdoors w/no AC). So I sent him some cooling neck wraps, aka a Neck Bandoo. I am not sure if it will help much with all his gear on, but you never know. I think if I were in 120 degree heat in full gear I'd have to soak in an ice filled tub.

The site has a program where you can donate one to a military person and they ship it for free. You can donate to someone you know or just a random soldier. Now that's awfully cool for $5.50.

Of course he will look a little more manly, but you get the idea:

The Battle of the Phlegm

I feel like crap.

Where's the vicks vaporub when you need it?

I think I have to see the doc.

Which sucks because I think I caught this mutating snot cold ouchie chest from my last doc's visit.

I'm really getting tired of these one after another colds. They are keeping me from working out. If my thighs get any fatter, I will start to moo.

Go see the movie Knocked Up. I won't tell you why, but it is funny.

I think I am going to go back to bed. Or at least try to.

My church lost a Deacon yesterday. Sonny had the coolest hair ever. A shock of white. And he was funny and nice. He was considerate all the way up to the end. Deacon S was driving and knew something was wrong. So he pulled over and ... just died. No crashing into anyone or anything. He had had several heart attacks before and surgery, but mom said (smiling) that "Now he can eat as many Oreos as he wants." Zoe and I prayed for him yesterday. Whenever I saw him, he was pretty strict about his diet, so I hope he gets a chance to eat whatever he wants now.

It was kind of sweet last night. Zoe read a book to herself before bedtime. I hope she loves to read like I do. I used to stay up nearly all night some nights reading a book.

Ok. Sleep.

I can do this. Even if I have to battle the phlegm again.

Your assignment today is to plant a flower (or buy some). Zoe came in yesterday to my room with this excited look on her face. She had been helping Momo plant flowers in the backyard. She opened her hands and they were as dirty as could be, and had rescued three little flowers that had fallen on the ground. She was filthy, and I wished I had a real camera for that one (my new phone doesn't take very clear pictures). That girl is a peach.

I love you internets!!

The Blehs

I had a bad reaction yesterday. I feel like caca poo poo today.

About an hour into the IV, I started having these low back pains - like spasms/cramps. The nurses say it feels exactly like what back labor feels like. I had the shakes a little and was supremely nauseated. I didn't really want to say anything, but the nurse knows me fairly well and knew that I was feeling punk.

They had already given me benadryl and some tylenol. After the spasms, they gave me some darvocet (I think) and some medrol. I was HIGH. Mom drove me there, so at least I had a ride home. Then I took Zoe to see the movie Gracie (a girl soccer movie which was ok, but slow - although worth it to see Elizabeth Shue and her cute bro, Andrew). Went to County Line, but I couldn't eat. Took home nearly an entire meal.

So today I was a big fat lamer. I have about zero energy and no motivation to do anything. Zoe and I chilled and watched The Pursuit of Happyness again. I think I need a dose of Kill Bill, so I might break out KB 1 & 2 tonight.

Anyway, that's about it for now. The highlight of my day will be taking a shower. Well that and the yum pancakes mom made for lunch: whole wheat with blueberries, yogurt, walnuts, and oatmeal in them. Delish! I had some New Zorleans coffee and I was in heaven.

I can do this. I think I will bust a move pretty soon.

Your assignment today is to sweat. Get moving today. Go plant something. Get thee to a beach or a pool. Walk. Run. Bike. Take your chirrins to a park. Or just play. If you do it, I will too.

Thanks Mrs. Gazz. I needed that email today. Not sure when the book will blossom, Claire. She's in there somewhere, I just need to crank her out.